appraisal crap

I have rarely felt so much pressure at appraisal time. It’s hardly my appraisal that I am worried about. Actually not at all. It is the appraisal that I have to do for my kids that keeps me awake. How do I balance it? How do I be fair to them and the company and to myself? How do I set the standard? My personal standard might be higher but the general standards might be lower.
It really keeps me quite occupied. I am forming opinions every second as the D day comes closer. I will have to let go some of what I hold close. They will have to go through their rite of passage. They will have to evolve. Sometimes I have no clue how they would but will have to trust them to swim. They will learn only by falling. I will have ot let them fail and not hold that against them. But at the appraisal, isn’t it my duty to hold them accountable. I must do what is good for the organization in the long run. After all purely going by responsibility, I must think long term. Long term. What is needed three years down the line? How do I balance my own requirements and progress with those of the kids? How do we move in sync? I am not so worried and insecure about my self; that is something I left behind long ago, but my worry is how do I take them along with me for the long run without hurting them.
Thoda sa toh girne de

Let them fall a bit,
Only by falling will they learn,
Learn they will to rise,
High above and well beyond
I wish them all the very best
And look with eager eyes
You may not spread my name
But you will spread the style
A style that I have in some small way
Hope to put inside
Inside your brains and in your soul
To touch you in many ways
And hope that you will someday
Reap all that I meant to grow
Grow grow grow