play well

Sports is a big thing for me. I feel as a child we came back to India when I was in the fourth standard and possibly we couldn’t devote enough time to sport as needed. Now I am into sports with a vengeance. So right now my car’s boot is always ready for sport and it always has the equipment and other paraphernalia ready for any sport. I am ready to play every day. Right now I am having a whale of a time. I swim, play water polo, badminton Sunday afternoon underarm cricket and I run. That’s a whole of a lot of activities to be done. Its tiring and I am not so sure how much the body can keep in pace, but for now, I am enjoying it and quite frankly I don’t really care too much on other stuff.

The greatest fun I get from this sporty endeavor of mine is the sports equipment. I love having the equipment ready to play. And I like buying decent quality stuff. You should have the right footwear and the right racquets and other stuff. No point compromising there. Jispa’s swim bag always has adequate equipment. She has two three eye goggles, one specialized for back stroke (dark mirror finish), a few swim caps and a lot of costumes. Normally she needs one but during her swim meets she needs one for every race. This is done so that after every race she can dry herself and get ready for the next race in a dry costume.so she need not run to change in a wet costume.  I saw her smart looking costumes drying together and felt nice.

Now she started running so she needs specialized running shoes. We took her to the sports shop where she tried on her shoes. If she is going to run a bit she might as well buy decent shoes. Again here I think Jasmine and I are living our childhood through her. She bought the Ultra light Skechers. They were expensive but I don’t think I found them expensive. I don’t think sports equipment is expensive at all. Surely they are high priced but considering that you are going to play all the time in them, pound the floor a gazillion times in them, they are to my mid worth it if you find them comfortable. In fact I think Jispa’s shoes are more expensive than any I must have bought for myself. But hell, if you must play a sport, play it well. I do think she needs running shorts as well but that is Jasmine’s territory and in any case it too will come when the time is right.

 A lot of this is wasted over the years. We surely have more swim goggles then we actually need, there is a little amount of waste but when you swim as much as she swims and you train as hard as she trains this is but a small price to pay. Equipment must not stop you from performing. There are swim suits for 40 thousand bucks as well. But they are designed to shave off 0.01 seconds. That too at an international arena. They won’t work at our level. For one – there so much a technique will do, secondly, we have manual stop watches with a greater error rate for timings. It just won’t help as much. When she comes to that level, hopefully I would manage to afford that much. There is one champion who I see comes from a very modest background. I see her swim. Her swimming costumes, cap and goggles aren’t branded at all. She swims with heart. At our swim meet I had a few prizes to give out; I just called her out quietly and gave her the kickboard. She is awesome. She swims lovely. When you see the other contestants coming in their Audi SUVs and wearing expensive costumes and caps, I love to see her dad ferry her in a scooter and I see her dive in with heart and come out trumps. That’s my favorite champion.

Sometimes I feel we give in too much. Should we do less? It’s a delicate balance. I like to let Jispa get her stuff, but I try to tell her to value it. She had a circular from school taking them to a ski trip in Swiss mountains or something. Priced at an awesome 2.7 lakhs or something. Jasmine asked her if she wanted to go. Of course she said yes. Then I stepped in and put a price perspective, explaining the cost of our holidays. “In that case “she said, “nopes, I don’t think so.” Many times when we are buying costumes and the costumes look and feel the same, I simply ask Jispa to consider the price as well. Yesterday we bought the Skechers but while she was trying out the Nike shoes I told her to see prices between the ones she liked. Don’t buy what you don’t like, but between two you like, check the tag dude. It’s cool to check the tag and buy. Completely cool.

 In fact as a marketing person I find it stupid not to check the tag. Is it worth it?

run

Today I ran.

Jispa has been doing pretty good at her swimming. She recently beat a whole of top draw players to emerge as the silver in the back stroke. She’s also been clocking good timings in the rest of the strokes. This is a good thing. We have been thinking about starting her land training as well. Basically the theory goes that you need a secondary sport to augment your swimming. It helps you develop other muscles than those worked for swimming. Earlier Jispa was doing her taekwondo in school until a change of teacher ensured she hated the sport and she stopped it. Jasmine and I were searching for an alternate.

The running bug has caught up with a lot of people and thanks to this a lot of running athletes have become/ started taking running clubs / coaching schedules. Jispa has been amongst the top runners in her standard. But her running style is quite horrible. Her jogging style is also quite bad. She runs taking extra-long strides making her action a kind of jumping hop run. Her jogging is a scrape at every step. Nevertheless she is fast and hence she was selected for her interschool.

I have tried teaching her to run in the past. She always over corrects and I am left frustrated. I surely don’t know how to teach to run. She is better off without me as her running coach. So having no option we took Jispa to a running club with a coach. Hopefully she may learn and it’s a form of a land exercise. We hope it works well without tiring her out. On the first day she ran while Jasmine and I took a stroll. Seeing the runners I was motivated to start running myself.

I love running and I love the rhythm and the fact that it’s such a simple way to push your body. I love it. But I had to give up running after my knee kept dislocating on the slightest provocation. A jump or a false move or any such aggravation. I tried being active by swimming and playing badminton. I have learnt to be more careful and avoid certain movements. But I hate not being able to run, especially run fast.

So today on the second day I gathered courage to start running as a part of the club. I thought I could surely keep pace with Jispa at the run. I was so scared. In the morning I woke and spent an agonizing five minutes trying to gather the courage to run. I almost did not make it. It was a scary fight I had with myself. Finally I decided I can run. Stay in control and run, I told myself.

At the ground I stretched with Jispa and started jogging. It’s a bit of rusty leg with running muscles being dormant. They required a bit of coaxing and I was jogging with ease in some time. I refuse to put extra pressure. I felt nice with the little that I was doing. It’s a start, a lovely start.

I hope to continue with this for some time and see where it takes us. No big hopes, no promises, just simply picking up the bits of my ability and my knee and starting to run. It’s a big thing for me. I love to run and I was denied my love for some time now. And now thanks to Jispa who knows– I may be able to run again. Afterwards during the morning I could feel the muscles around the knee, as if they have got a good exercise. Let’s see how this dam thing progresses.

I want to run, I love it. It’s going to be tough and I hope I don’t screw it up. The trick is to understand the limits and work within them. It’s a delicate balance.

tischiawn

This is freaking hilarious. So would it be Clint Eastwood or Bruce Lee? To someone who grew up on a diet of Clint Eastwood films and was fed the one magic film of Bruce Lee, it’s a tough choice to make.  On one hand you have the legend wooden face who came in these spaghetti westerns (called so because they were produced by the Italians) and shot the shit out of the baddies. On the other hand you have the one film wonder. I think he has come in a few more movies, but Enter the Dragon was the only movie I have seen of him. I think the tragedy was that he died before its release making it a bigger cult. I would emulate both in my childhood depending on the movie I had just seen. Enter the dragon was I had seen many times. In Dubai, when I  was a little boy, the club would have a movie night every week and we would look forward to it. Largely the movies were repeated and Enter The Dragon was favorite. Yaaaiiieee. There comes my Karate chop.

Like any other boy I too had an interest in guns. I loved guns and it helped that I was naturally good at aiming and keeping my hand steady. I loved the guns I had and would play with them every day. even today I would love to play and practice with a toy gun :). I remember playing so much that once the servant in the house put a really small parrot toy in one corner of the room and challenged me to hit it from the other side of the room. And whack… it flew. I was pretty cool. Then I remember trying to hit while moving and all sorts of different situations. It was fun. Clint Eastwood gave me a lot to dream of.

So for sheer breadth of movies and the dreams that followed guess in my head it was clint Eastwood that won. After all I don’t remember ever wearing that yellow track suit but I do remember wearing cowboy boots. The cowboy western image is still more resonant with me that the lanky pants flexi kick kung fu. Guns defeated the nang chaku in my life. Aiiiieeeee….. yaooo… Bang. Poop.

And nothing else exemplifies this philosophy than this scene from the greatest of them all – INDIANA JONES. The epic adventurer, searching the worlds for lost treasure and an unlikely action star.

And here is another legendary one from a Clint Eastwood movie, though not featuring him.

Alexanderian grace

Jispa is getting her teen attitude and she isn’t so much of a push over these days. She can get mighty pissed with us and especially me. Today morning she forgot to take her school shoes when she left with me for her swim training. So she decided to go to school in her chappels. She had another (non-compliant) pair of shoes in the car. I asked her to wear those but she refused. Black chappels are preferable to shoes that are not completely black. Oh hell. I tried telling her otherwise but she refused and I left it at that. It’s her problem. She has to deal with the school authorities and the head. So I let her be. Then Jasmine got on her case and then both of us just let her be. Her issue. While we were waiting for the bus to come in Jispa said today she also had physical education class. Ok that was the limit. Jispa wear your shoes – jasmine and I put our foot down rather forcefully. Jispa said fine. But then she was pissed as hell. “why do you have to scold me and tell me.” “because you don’t listen otherwise” “but that doesn’t mean you have to scold me at the start itself. First tell me properly and then scold me if I don’t listen”.”sorry but on this you wouldn’t have listened to me and we were telling you about it”. “no but you shouldn’t start with a  scolding” “you start listening. I also don’t like scolding. When you were younger we would only speak sweetly, but now if you don’t get a scolding you don’t listen” “no… I do listen” “ok you promise to listen and I promise not to scold. Right now also I am talking properly” “ no you are not”…. You get the drift. Jispa and I were having a conversation in which she was pretty pissed. No she gives me a push back and she gives Jasmine a push back on a lot of issues as well.

I try to listen to her and talk to her if she pushes back, I try not to clamp her down. Speak. Talk converse. If she screams or talks rubbish when there is conversation then I raise the tempo and clamp down, but then also normal speaking and civilized arguments are allowed.

This time she was pissed as hell. She refused to give in. Then I told her “forget, your school bus is coming, you leave”. She refused to tell me bye. I told her “while going say bye dude. don’t leave like that”, She didn’t listen. In fact she made a point by telling Jasmine bye and ignoring me. She was pissed as hell. I am smiling. It’s ok.

Many years ago when my marriage was being discussed, Jasmine’s parents had to finalize the hall in which the ceremony was to take place. Earlier it was the girl’s side of the marriage that bore all the expenses. Now the progressive gujjus have a discussion. Typically marriage is borne by the girl’s side and the reception is split into half or some ratio. Or some such logic. In my sister’s marriage we had chosen a hall which her in-laws made a slight noise. Not too much but a simple question about it is also viewed very seriously. I know the big agonizing issue that went about inside my house but we pressed on nevertheless and possibly it was a non-issue at their end but it created a huge discussion at our end.

So in my marriage Jasmine’s parents were looking at a hall but that one nearer to where we stay and which was the normal choice in their family as well was under reconstruction. So you needed to look elsewhere. So they zeroed in a hall which was nearer to their house but not an upmarket neighborhood. In fact it was a pretty non-descript place. I was aghast at my parents disapproval. Those days I worked in Gujarat and when I was in Mumbai I had a showdown with them. I found my normally liberal leaning dad suddenly turn conservative. Mom was completely unhappy. I couldn’t believe that they were going against the very values they inculcated in me. How can we object with the choice of hall? They said they will pay the whole expense in any case as it was a smaller function for marriage and simple reception. I had a show down with dad on this. It wasn’t pretty. I was pissed as hell. And we didn’t speak to each other. The next day I was to leave for Gujarat and mom and dad offered to drop me to the station. Sure. I don’t think we spoke in the car as well. As I got off, I paused for a brief moment and I turned around and said bye mom, bye dad. I guess dad was waiting for me to say bye. He said bye as well. It was brief period of making up. I guess if guys simply say hi to each other – it’s reconciliation. I remember his face. He too was a bit pissed but he too let it go. It was both side giving an inch and then an el.

I am forever glad about how I behaved. I am so happy and I remember that moment very clearly. I remember that pause and I remember thinking, I must say bye. It is something I will never forget. As it turned out, that was the last time I saw my dad. I know that in the 23 odd years I would have known him he would not have held the last 23 hours against me but still, last chats are last chats. I would hated going through life knowing I refused to reconcile when I had the time. It didn't take much from me or him to forget. It’s ok to have disagreements but at the end you must part as friends, agreeing to disagree at the worst.

I have always hated parting badly. That’s not on. I always tell people to part properly. It’s not that we can’t behave in a civilized manner. Even if people mean you harm, when they leave you have a chance to sow a seed of love. Like Porus, everyone deserves to be treated in a manner that befits them. It’s for us to be Alexander. So it was history repeating all over again. Jispa was pissed at me and had an argument with me. While she left the car, like my dad I too was in the driver’s seat with mom in the adjoining seat. But this time, I tried to say bye but my pre-teen refused.

Awww. Jispa. It’s ok. I understand your rage. It’s a good thing. You are growing up. Push back is good or parents will forever be hovering around you. Just remember it’s never personal and it’s definitely never for keeps. We both are growing up. You faster than us. But in the end – my advice to you is simple. While leaving always have the grace to part well as you never know when you going to get that chance again. You can have a disagreement but do not let that take away your grace, dignity, ears, sense, responsibility and love. It’s tough but to conquer that is Alexanderian. I was really lucky once.

Read more about the epic battle here. Its quite a nice fascinating read ...  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_the_Hydaspes

is it supposed to move or isnt it?

There is nothing that WD 40 can’t solve of course with a little help from duct tape. Both together form a formidable team that can be used to solve almost everything at home.

My first brush with WD 40 was when my dad used it on so many different things. What is WD40 you ask. Tsch tsch. WD 40 is the amazing spray in a blue can which when sprayed on anything will make it move or stop it from creaking. In a home over time everything creaks. Hinges of a door, the stopper that wont stop, the swinging hinges of a swing, the fan, the rollers… everything. I remember dad would remove the WD40 can and pssssttt noise gone. Here is the classic shot of the can. You see the red straw at the side – that is the thing that goes inside the nozzle and helps you direct the spray appropriately. My memories of this bottle is always with the straw. Both would be bound together with a rapidly deteriorating rubber band that half melted and was brittle thanks to the heat.

The other thing was duct tape or cello tape as its popularly called. We would have lots of the borwn tape in the house ready to fix almost everything. Dad was an engineer. He used to have a tool kit around the house and would love to fix everything. Duct tape was the next thing he would use. Just tape it and it would be done.

I can picture my dad on a holiday in his jurta pyjama roaming around the house. Mom would complain about something and dad would examine it. He would either call for the WD40 or duct tape and then a few sprays or tears later – presto – its solved.

Just a couple of days back we had a problem at home. Our fan started giving off a violent noise. A violent creaky noise that would be difficult to ignore while sleeping. I wondered what had gone wrong. Jasmine told me that our maid Devki doesn’t reach clean the fan properly. She simply pulls down the fan blade and dens it while cleaning it. That is the classical Daniel Kahneman thinking fast and slow problem. Jasmine was thinking fast and she was jumping to a conclusion. She put two and two together, saw a cause and an effect and said that Devki must have spoiled it. Possibly the blades are bent. I wondered if we needed to call the electrician. Then I wondered if the fan would fall down on us as something as really wrong with it. I don’t why but I don’t do the ‘do it yourself’ fixing bit these days. I was pretty good at it in the good old days. But now I seem to have given up that part of me. I don’t know why but I think mind experiments are getting the better of hand experiments.

So this time I thought let me look at it myself. I tried aligning the blades. Really rubbish stuff I did. Then I switched the fan on. Still the violent noise was there. So I played around and tried to think about the source. It seemed from the hook by which the fan is hung from the ceiling. So I tried to realign the fan on the hook. It still seemed to be an issue. At varying fan speeds, the noise would stop and start. I told Jasmine that the noise is from the top and she suggested WD40. Yes. Did we have it at home? Of course she said. Wow. I forgot we had the essential ingredient at home. So we took the can – with the withering rubber band from the bathroom loft (always there) and sprayed. I felt like dad all over again. A few sprays here and there and a few more just be sure (like dad again) and we switched on the fan. Poof Noise gone. Simple isn’t it.

I told Jasmine that there is nothing you can’t solve with WD40 or Duct tape. Today as I was searching for the WD40 image I saw this image as well of the flow chart of WD40 and duct tape. It seems the world has gotten this idea well before me. Hehehe.

Classic isn’t it?