22 laps… that is 550 meters. That’s what I swam today. The most I have ever swum at one time. Wohooo.. I feel good. A few days back I found a trouser of mine closing a bit tighter. The scared me. I promised my self that I will swim hard now. Probably age is catching up. Metabolism is slower and the propensity to put on a rounder self is greater. Probably this was also due to two days of marriage revelry which was preceded by three days of conference. Five days of pure sugar. Feasting and pumping your body with sugar can only add a few inches to your mid riff. I have this tendency to binge on food and then completely stay off without even feeling any craving. It’s not like I punish myself when I am off fried or sweet food. It’s a natural shift. SO right now – I am healthy Sam. So I told Jispa that I will do 20 laps.
It’s always the best thing to announce your goal to someone. I keep telling myself and Jasmine and Jispa that I would do 20 laps. 20 laps. Out of which 10 will be in one go. So today morning also I told Jispa that I will hit 20. At six am I jumped in. There are some days when you somehow have reserve energy and you end up swimming quite well. The moment you hit the water you know this is going to be a good day. Your legs keep splashing and your hands glide through the water. Today … today… was NO such day. After the first lap, I was thinking about resting. The third lap and I wanted to stop. Legs not moving, hands not in sync, my reserve dipping and I was left wondering, what I ate last night. Why am I tired already? But a word made to Jispa was a word made to Jispa. If she does it, I have to as well. I started pushing myself. Four, five, six…. Then on it was good. You get tired but you are ok with it. The muscles then get used to it. Slowly slowly pushing it. Easy on the hands, hold your position. Keep kicking. Check body, head a little ahead, the arms must bend while pulling back, imagine you are pulling a rope, yes, keep going, push the water back. Everything that the coach told me was going through my head. Ten Down. A bit of rest and the next set begins. Taking a couple of breaks I finished the rest.
I sat out of the water, at the edge of the pool for a few seconds. Taking in the achievement. Wow. I have never swum so much at one time. 20 was a big goal of mine for some time. Now on to the next goal. 40 laps. That is a proper kilometer of swimming. Of course the mini goal on the way is the doing 20 without stopping. Another Big goal is to learn the tumble turn from Jispa. It seems that’s a tough one. You end up blowing out with force so that you don’t breathe in water when you somersault inside.
Now that my swimming style has been refined, one doesn’t get that stressed out post the swim. It a bit sore on the muscles but it’s not like I am limping or anything. Now I can really appreciate what Jispa goes through every day. In the evening many times while sleeping, Jispa requests us to press her legs. Especially when there has been a kicking session at the coaching camp. I have always loved massaging her legs. These days we have been using olive oil. It’s a dad thing I guess. I can understand but now I have the right to say – I almost truly understand her … pain? Well it’s not really a pain as she never really does complain about it. She seems to enjoy it. I once explained to her that her pain is due to muscles tearing and repairing and getting stronger. I think knowing the reason for pain is enough for her to bear it. Also she is doing something she loves. She enjoys her swimming, she enjoys improving her timing… and that’s pushing her forward. That’s important. I have always maintained that a motivation for a champion must come in from within. You can’t push from outside. I can’t push her. I won’t push her. I can only wake up in the morning at 5, wake her up by 5.15 and take her to the pool. That’s my deed. I can press her legs and give her a good diet. But the Pool is hers. I have to stay out.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Shopping requires growing up
It can get frustrating shopping with Jispa. Not that I really blame her. It’s just that as parents we need to grow up. Jispa is nine years old and like a good nine year old she has an opinion. Whatever the reason, whatever the thought process in her mind… how can I fault her for having an opinion? She just can refuse to wear something out of the blue. So we always get her to choose her clothes. These days I have been trying to get her to buy a dress. Too much jeans makes a tom boy. She has very clear stuff that she would like to wear. Rule one – no sleeveless. I don’t know why… she never gives a reason except – just! And most of the pretty dresses are just that – sleeveless. So this time I really picked her brain and told her to explain to me why she doesn’t want a dress. I finally cornered her. She was not clearing her preference because if she explained to us what she wanted and Jasmine got something basis that then she would have to wear it, whether she liked it or not. So she and I got into a pact. I would only buy what she liked and she would not be pressured into buying anything. In return she will shop with me for a dress. I finally understood what she wanted.
She wanted a simple solid color dress. No frills, no stupid embroidery, no extra flowers or motifs, not too much flair. Basically a women’s dress and not some baby Barbie pink floral dress. I like that. That’s my girl. It’s a different thing that we never did get anything to that specification.
But I think I figured a little bit more about her. She does not immediately explain her mind. She thinks a lot. Many times I tell Jasmine that don’t take her answers or behavior at face value. There is a lot she doesn’t tell and her mind ticks faster than anything else Jasmine has ever experienced. Be aware of her insecurities; be aware that she thinks a lot. She thinks about what you might think basis the answer she gives. She is two steps ahead of you. Not in a shrewd selfish way, but in an acute perceptive way. How do I know all this? Simple – I remember my childhood.
Now I think I might have got her shopping pulse - How am I to get shopping with her without my brains being fried? This time we went shopping for an Indian dress at fabindia. A Salwar kurta. I led her to the place. Showed her the designs and we quickly agreed to a piece to which I quickly agreed. She is an action lady not a dainty girl with a Barbie purse. Jasmine keeps blaming me for making a tom boy of her. What I realized one day, is that possibly Jasmine is the one influencing her dress sense. Jasmine never wears a dress. On a daily basis she is a sloppy dresser, being in a track and t shirt through the day. What role model does she have at home. No lipstick, no make up, pants and t-shirts. Further proof – Jispa loves chapsticks and guess what – jasmine applies chapstick. Jasmine will definitely point at me for a lot of things, but I guess here – she underestimates her role as a role model as well. It’s impossible that I am the root cause of all evil :).
So Jispa found her single color salwar kurta and tried it out for me. Man, has she grown up, she looked nice and cute and grown up. I am finally coming to terms with her growing up. It’s difficult but I have no choice. It’s a funny uneasy balance. I push her to grow up and behave on so many things, and then she keeps reminding and fighting for us to recognize that she is grown up. Whoops. This is one tug-o-war.
Here is she… trying one for size. She finally picked this one. I really like this photo. I really love her. Gosh.
She wanted a simple solid color dress. No frills, no stupid embroidery, no extra flowers or motifs, not too much flair. Basically a women’s dress and not some baby Barbie pink floral dress. I like that. That’s my girl. It’s a different thing that we never did get anything to that specification.
But I think I figured a little bit more about her. She does not immediately explain her mind. She thinks a lot. Many times I tell Jasmine that don’t take her answers or behavior at face value. There is a lot she doesn’t tell and her mind ticks faster than anything else Jasmine has ever experienced. Be aware of her insecurities; be aware that she thinks a lot. She thinks about what you might think basis the answer she gives. She is two steps ahead of you. Not in a shrewd selfish way, but in an acute perceptive way. How do I know all this? Simple – I remember my childhood.
Now I think I might have got her shopping pulse - How am I to get shopping with her without my brains being fried? This time we went shopping for an Indian dress at fabindia. A Salwar kurta. I led her to the place. Showed her the designs and we quickly agreed to a piece to which I quickly agreed. She is an action lady not a dainty girl with a Barbie purse. Jasmine keeps blaming me for making a tom boy of her. What I realized one day, is that possibly Jasmine is the one influencing her dress sense. Jasmine never wears a dress. On a daily basis she is a sloppy dresser, being in a track and t shirt through the day. What role model does she have at home. No lipstick, no make up, pants and t-shirts. Further proof – Jispa loves chapsticks and guess what – jasmine applies chapstick. Jasmine will definitely point at me for a lot of things, but I guess here – she underestimates her role as a role model as well. It’s impossible that I am the root cause of all evil :).
So Jispa found her single color salwar kurta and tried it out for me. Man, has she grown up, she looked nice and cute and grown up. I am finally coming to terms with her growing up. It’s difficult but I have no choice. It’s a funny uneasy balance. I push her to grow up and behave on so many things, and then she keeps reminding and fighting for us to recognize that she is grown up. Whoops. This is one tug-o-war.
Here is she… trying one for size. She finally picked this one. I really like this photo. I really love her. Gosh.
Friday, February 17, 2012
haw many have you missed?
Finally I seem to be getting a grip over things. I guess this job change has been very good from a learning perspective. I joined here in November 2010. It’s been a year plus on the seat. With the benefit of hindsight I can say, I came in with a bit of arrogance. I thought I could radically change the way things are done around here. Give new direction to the way marketing must function, show the fellas a trick or two, ‘oh what a great boy am I’. Quickly I ended on the wrong side of things. No one likes to be shown that they are wrong. I realized that I wasn’t exactly entirely welcome here. People are resistant to change. Things change far more slowly in a large organization. Egos are volatile things. Everything can move must it requires a gargantuan force to move it. I am reminded of a phrase ‘when immovable object meets unstoppable force. Yes. It’s been tough. Very tough one year.
Also managing 15 heads is another challenge. I have to understand their jobs, their restrictions, their own strengths and their own weakness. Yesterday I arranged for a talk with the IT guys with my team. I thought it was pretty informative. Any one is worth listening to as long as he is saying something from his experience. The head of the department said something which I hope to never forget. He was talking about his a-ha moment when he changed some fundamental things about the structure of the trading engine. I asked him about the risks associated with the change. He said “we realized one thing. Whenever you do something it is very important to understand the limitations of what you can do. As long as you can understand that , you are not likely to go wrong”. Yup. It takes time to understand that. I think those words are golden. I too came in knowing my strengths, knowing that my strengths are my weakness, but I really did not know my limitations enough. I did not know the limitations of my team, I did not know the limitations of the infrastructure they are dealing with. Its easy for a guy who is new to the system to come in and say that the way things are run here …. It doesn’t make sense. But I learnt – and it’s taken me a year to learn, that things are difficult. Have patience, understand people, understand their limitations, and understand the limitations of the system. The fine line is to understand this yet push through change. Yet keep that fire. Of course I have to change the system, but by staying inside of it, not by being outside of it.
Wasn’t that the reason I left consulting and joined the business? The chance of doing real work and making a real impact by staying inside of it. That was my objective. No matter how smart you get, life always gets the better of you. That is the best part of it. It never ever fails to teach you a trick or two. You have to be willing to put your nose to the grind, bend and have patience.
Speaking of life, parenting also teaches you something every day. Every time when Jispa sleeps we know she will rotate quite a bit. She twists herself in unimaginable postures. She flips around and changes her pose in ways you think are impossible. So every time she sleeps, I put a bunch of pillows on the floor. She might fall anytime and at least the pillow will help. Sometimes, she likes to sleep in our room. We put the mattress and make her bed on the ground. Then as a precaution I put a pillow near the leg of the bed, just in case she hits it, then near an edge near the wall, just in case she hits it, then near the cupboard, just in case she hits it. The day before, she wanted to sleep inside. We let her. I helped her make the bed. And I missed putting the pillows. Also she’s grown up now. At four am, I hear a thud followed by her saying ‘ouch’. I get up to see her sitting up and rubbing her head while she saying something. I ask her what happened. “ I hit the bed”. “oops, don’t worry, go back to sleep, its ok, I will put a pillow there”. Now she is old enough not to cry on getting hit. She went back to sleep. In the morning I asked her how was her head. She looks at me for a second and remarks “oh, I thought it was a dream”.
That’s the thing with parenting – you don’t know how many you have saved, but you surely know how many you miss. I won’t know how times my prudence will have saved her, but I will definitely know when I missed doing something and it resulted in something bad happening.Hah!
Also managing 15 heads is another challenge. I have to understand their jobs, their restrictions, their own strengths and their own weakness. Yesterday I arranged for a talk with the IT guys with my team. I thought it was pretty informative. Any one is worth listening to as long as he is saying something from his experience. The head of the department said something which I hope to never forget. He was talking about his a-ha moment when he changed some fundamental things about the structure of the trading engine. I asked him about the risks associated with the change. He said “we realized one thing. Whenever you do something it is very important to understand the limitations of what you can do. As long as you can understand that , you are not likely to go wrong”. Yup. It takes time to understand that. I think those words are golden. I too came in knowing my strengths, knowing that my strengths are my weakness, but I really did not know my limitations enough. I did not know the limitations of my team, I did not know the limitations of the infrastructure they are dealing with. Its easy for a guy who is new to the system to come in and say that the way things are run here …. It doesn’t make sense. But I learnt – and it’s taken me a year to learn, that things are difficult. Have patience, understand people, understand their limitations, and understand the limitations of the system. The fine line is to understand this yet push through change. Yet keep that fire. Of course I have to change the system, but by staying inside of it, not by being outside of it.
Wasn’t that the reason I left consulting and joined the business? The chance of doing real work and making a real impact by staying inside of it. That was my objective. No matter how smart you get, life always gets the better of you. That is the best part of it. It never ever fails to teach you a trick or two. You have to be willing to put your nose to the grind, bend and have patience.
Speaking of life, parenting also teaches you something every day. Every time when Jispa sleeps we know she will rotate quite a bit. She twists herself in unimaginable postures. She flips around and changes her pose in ways you think are impossible. So every time she sleeps, I put a bunch of pillows on the floor. She might fall anytime and at least the pillow will help. Sometimes, she likes to sleep in our room. We put the mattress and make her bed on the ground. Then as a precaution I put a pillow near the leg of the bed, just in case she hits it, then near an edge near the wall, just in case she hits it, then near the cupboard, just in case she hits it. The day before, she wanted to sleep inside. We let her. I helped her make the bed. And I missed putting the pillows. Also she’s grown up now. At four am, I hear a thud followed by her saying ‘ouch’. I get up to see her sitting up and rubbing her head while she saying something. I ask her what happened. “ I hit the bed”. “oops, don’t worry, go back to sleep, its ok, I will put a pillow there”. Now she is old enough not to cry on getting hit. She went back to sleep. In the morning I asked her how was her head. She looks at me for a second and remarks “oh, I thought it was a dream”.
That’s the thing with parenting – you don’t know how many you have saved, but you surely know how many you miss. I won’t know how times my prudence will have saved her, but I will definitely know when I missed doing something and it resulted in something bad happening.Hah!
Wednesday, February 08, 2012
I have been writing.... elsewhere
I have written stuff that has appeared in press before but it was always for someone else. Sometimes for the business head, or sometimes on a product. But this one was published in my name. It’s not a great achievement for sure. Online sites are always hungry for content… but hell… it’s there, isn’t it?
I don’t expect great views, reviews, comments but the essence of it is pretty much strong. It is pretty much strong marketing fundamental stuff. That I am ready to risk my neck out. Read on only if you are marketing inclined, else it’s not likely to be of much use. Though I did try to simplify it.
Thanks Dharen if it sounds good. And if it doesn’t – I am sorry. I probably did not get it right.
http://www.exchange4media.com/45298_font-colorredguest-articlefont-so-you-think-that%E2%80%99s-a-nice-ad-eh.html
I don’t expect great views, reviews, comments but the essence of it is pretty much strong. It is pretty much strong marketing fundamental stuff. That I am ready to risk my neck out. Read on only if you are marketing inclined, else it’s not likely to be of much use. Though I did try to simplify it.
Thanks Dharen if it sounds good. And if it doesn’t – I am sorry. I probably did not get it right.
http://www.exchange4media.com/45298_font-colorredguest-articlefont-so-you-think-that%E2%80%99s-a-nice-ad-eh.html
Monday, February 06, 2012
Because its there
On Saturday Jispa had her sports day. She is a nice light tall runner. I have a lot of problems with her running style but have learnt not to correct them. She seems to be jumping around taking strides longer than natural. I think she loses too much energy and effort in her bid to run faster. But nevertheless – she struck three golds. The max possible. The 50 meter dash, 200 M and the relay.
A few weeks back, she told us that from this year onwards she has a 200M race. It involves a circular track and she was wondering why not all the kids start on the same line. I explained the dynamics of length alongside a curve to her. I also told her that for her good, its probably the best thing to be at the innermost circle. This way, she would always be trying to catch up and suddenly on the last curve she would turn the fastest and find herself in an amazing lead. Being on the outer curve gives the illusion on being in the lead at the start and one could possibly slow down.
When we saw the race on Saturday, we realized that the 200M race allowed for lane change from the start itself. They only gave curved starting line a la the 1500M race. But she was still starting from the inside lane and she ran well to win. She tailed till around the 100M mark, which was more due to the staggered starting line than anything else. Pretty cool. She also ran the first leg of the relay to give her team a good lead which they comfortably held on to, actually increased it, till the end.
Then came the father’s events. I had my knee jammed a few weeks back playing squash. It’s an old injury which somehow came back to haunt me. Basically I twisted my right knee and my ligaments became loose. I had been half nursing the knee. A few days back Jasmine asked me if I was participating and I said no way. She seemed cock sure I would be. She asked me a couple of time more in the days coming upto the event. She did seem a bit eager. On the event day she even kept abreast of the schedule. She seemed so keen that I decided to run. Love is blind and combined with vanity it is completely stupid. Wearing my knee cap I trudged towards the starting line. Ready to run dude. Ready to run. The heart rate moves up a bit in anticipation. The Mind is focused on the finishing line. You take the track line that seems to offer less gravel. It’s a relatively less crowded line. I began observing how the guy was giving the clap. What is the giveaway. As he is about to slap the boards he first takes them slightly away before bringing them together. That’s your cue. That split second gives you the start faster than others. Impossible to catch and perfectly legal. Your muscles just push the ground a spit second faster. I pushed off the starting line. Legs pushing up and hitting the ground hard. Only the ball of the foot and toes hitting the ground. I was in a comfortable lead. Running hard, I felt an effortless glide. It was one of my best runs. I was enjoying every moment of it. Half way through I could see no one beside me, and I also contemplated slowing down for the final leg, till I felt a twitch. My knee. Dam. My knee. The muscles had come lose around it. STOP. There is no glory in walking out of the stadium in a crutch. I stopped and walked off the track. I did it. I screwed my knee completely.
No regrets though. I started well, I ran really nice and I would have won. That’s all I need. And in the process I just pushed my knee recovery a few weeks. Worth it. In mind I stay on as the fastest father. What else do I need? A little bit of prudence, possibly? Next time.
Winning at 36 feels good. When I entered college I was 58kgs with a 28 inch waist. I feel ill often enough. I had no muscles and a really wiry frame. My god I was a thin weakly child. I loved sports but wasn’t fit enough to follow through on it. It’s taken a lot many years to come to a winning position. In my cricket team there is a player who even played Ranji in his heyday. He is now a pale shadow, he put on weight and I outscore him. I got a bit better over the years and the others simply deteriorated. For some people life blooms late.
I never thought I would swim, play squash, cricket or run this much, so late in my life… and actually be half decent at it. It’s a dream I am living. And so when people asked me after the event why did I run, or why would I want to spend half the day in a hot sun laying cricket, or why would I get into the pool early morning in the cold. What can I tell them? What answer do I give?
George Mallory is famously quoted as having replied to the question "Why do you want to climb Mount Everest?" with the retort "Because it's there", which has been called "the most famous three words in mountaineering. I guess no one will understand a real reason and this is the best answer to give.
I play because is there to play. I run because I have legs to run.
A few weeks back, she told us that from this year onwards she has a 200M race. It involves a circular track and she was wondering why not all the kids start on the same line. I explained the dynamics of length alongside a curve to her. I also told her that for her good, its probably the best thing to be at the innermost circle. This way, she would always be trying to catch up and suddenly on the last curve she would turn the fastest and find herself in an amazing lead. Being on the outer curve gives the illusion on being in the lead at the start and one could possibly slow down.
When we saw the race on Saturday, we realized that the 200M race allowed for lane change from the start itself. They only gave curved starting line a la the 1500M race. But she was still starting from the inside lane and she ran well to win. She tailed till around the 100M mark, which was more due to the staggered starting line than anything else. Pretty cool. She also ran the first leg of the relay to give her team a good lead which they comfortably held on to, actually increased it, till the end.
Then came the father’s events. I had my knee jammed a few weeks back playing squash. It’s an old injury which somehow came back to haunt me. Basically I twisted my right knee and my ligaments became loose. I had been half nursing the knee. A few days back Jasmine asked me if I was participating and I said no way. She seemed cock sure I would be. She asked me a couple of time more in the days coming upto the event. She did seem a bit eager. On the event day she even kept abreast of the schedule. She seemed so keen that I decided to run. Love is blind and combined with vanity it is completely stupid. Wearing my knee cap I trudged towards the starting line. Ready to run dude. Ready to run. The heart rate moves up a bit in anticipation. The Mind is focused on the finishing line. You take the track line that seems to offer less gravel. It’s a relatively less crowded line. I began observing how the guy was giving the clap. What is the giveaway. As he is about to slap the boards he first takes them slightly away before bringing them together. That’s your cue. That split second gives you the start faster than others. Impossible to catch and perfectly legal. Your muscles just push the ground a spit second faster. I pushed off the starting line. Legs pushing up and hitting the ground hard. Only the ball of the foot and toes hitting the ground. I was in a comfortable lead. Running hard, I felt an effortless glide. It was one of my best runs. I was enjoying every moment of it. Half way through I could see no one beside me, and I also contemplated slowing down for the final leg, till I felt a twitch. My knee. Dam. My knee. The muscles had come lose around it. STOP. There is no glory in walking out of the stadium in a crutch. I stopped and walked off the track. I did it. I screwed my knee completely.
No regrets though. I started well, I ran really nice and I would have won. That’s all I need. And in the process I just pushed my knee recovery a few weeks. Worth it. In mind I stay on as the fastest father. What else do I need? A little bit of prudence, possibly? Next time.
Winning at 36 feels good. When I entered college I was 58kgs with a 28 inch waist. I feel ill often enough. I had no muscles and a really wiry frame. My god I was a thin weakly child. I loved sports but wasn’t fit enough to follow through on it. It’s taken a lot many years to come to a winning position. In my cricket team there is a player who even played Ranji in his heyday. He is now a pale shadow, he put on weight and I outscore him. I got a bit better over the years and the others simply deteriorated. For some people life blooms late.
I never thought I would swim, play squash, cricket or run this much, so late in my life… and actually be half decent at it. It’s a dream I am living. And so when people asked me after the event why did I run, or why would I want to spend half the day in a hot sun laying cricket, or why would I get into the pool early morning in the cold. What can I tell them? What answer do I give?
George Mallory is famously quoted as having replied to the question "Why do you want to climb Mount Everest?" with the retort "Because it's there", which has been called "the most famous three words in mountaineering. I guess no one will understand a real reason and this is the best answer to give.
I play because is there to play. I run because I have legs to run.
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