made it

This weekend was something special as far as dreams and ambitions are concerned. And a whole host of learnings and character building was done.

Jispa has been swimming for, I think 5 years now. She has slowly but surely kept scaling one peak after another. She keeps on swimming and wants to push her boundaries on her own. She knows what her goals are and she wants to achieve them. Many times we have given up and told her point blank, we would be happy if you give it up but there is some inner fire, some inner desire that she wants to achieve and that is fueling her dedication. She is dedicated to swimming. As far as natural talent for swimming is concerned, I don’t think she is up there with the natural born swimmers who just get into the pool and know what to do and how to do it. These kids just keep winning championship and break records one after another. They can do this with less effort and dedication. They are just meant to swim and they feel the water and cut through it much better than anyone else. Jispa is not that. For her swimming is hard work, a lot of effort and a whole lot of grit. If she doesn’t work as hard she will not be able to make it.

She likes to go for her sessions and she doesn’t miss many. At least not even one by choice. She would miss only due to illness or some other school commitment or our family vacations or something like that. She wakes up on time without too much fuss these days and she eats her bananas and she has her medicines (ayurvedic general health types) and she goes for her swimming. I am sure if the pool was close by she would have gone there by herself.

When the swimming timings started interfering with the studies timing we made it very clear to her that we would not let one affect the other. She has been trying her bets to keep up with studies as well. Right now the new distraction is her cell phone and whatsapp. That is another mountain for her to overcome. But all said and done, her quiet dedication to her swimming is something that has our utmost respect.

Though I think she doesn’t listen to her coach enough on her technique and that takes a beating and stops her from achieving the next level.

So all in all, it’s a tough swim schedule and sport for her. But she has really done well, and I think we respect that. Jasmine is not prone to showing emotions but I know for a fact that she is quite proud of her achievements. Of course Jasmine has a tendency to keep upping the game and demanding more and I tend to just be equally straight face. In the meets and the competitions and in the training pool etc, we meet parents of all types. There are always a bunch of fathers or mothers who are completely not bothered by all this. They don’t come to the events and meets and they have no clue about this and they are very clearly not in support of the swim schedules their kids keep. On the other side you have the crazy parents where both are heavily involved and bothered about the progress of the child and some who are completely committed to their kid’s achievements. Their cheering is one thing, their level of competiveness is another thing and the pressure they put on their child is to be seen to be believed. Here there is plenty of stupid word of mouth, half knowledge and a crazy ability and desire to push your child. Very early enough I decided that I will not give any input to the child. I will keep all my supposed intelligence to myself. In fact, I will do only what a father needs to do. Wake up and take the child to swim. I will help in the auxiliary things, such as getting the kid to eat, take care of her health and most important of them all – massage the kids legs and back at night. Because the coach would just kill her by giving the hard, really hard sets. Wow.

This year in the middle we changed our pool and we went to a new coach. He set the target high for the kid and gave the toughest sets possible to all the kids. He pushed the kids to work hard. Jispa also had two sessions extra of land training. We practically woke up early every single day of the week. The result – Jispa started performing beyond what she was doing thus so far. It was a tough long grind. She was getting ready for the state championships wherein she could fulfill her long cherished dream. DAD, one day, one time at least – I want to go to the nationals. The state championships were held last week and the weekend before that – She was down with fever and tonsils. Bam… out of the blue she was out and her crucial taper period where the coach gives easy swims to taper the kid so as to have relaxed and ready rested muscles, was lost. There was no way she would recover from this. The antibiotics would kill her muscles.

So she just made in time for the state selection meet. Her first race was a 100 m free which she promptly lost to come 6^th or 8^th place. She gave 2 seconds worse off her best. This was not going to be her meet. She went through the other races, improving only a little by little. The last race for her was the 50M back. I had seen her 100 M back and I had told her, here is your last chance and I genuinely think you will max this. Jispa has a good take off from the block. She inevitably has an explosive start because she uses her legs well to kick off.. also the case with her tumble turn... but she fritters away the advantage midway into the course. 50M is one place where in spite of her ill health, she had a chance. I told her, I think you will make it in the 50. It was a bit of a bravado but inside I knew there was hope. Also the three days of competition meant that her body would get that much more time to recover from the illness.

She started the race well and I followed her to the finish. I think I also screamed and cheered her (something I don’t normally do)… and then towards the last 10, I knew it, Jispa was not in the top two. Only the top two qualify. And so I simply turned and walked away. I am very good with the finishes and normally I know the podium finish order in a close race. In swimming it’s not easy to do that. Jispa was a third or even a fourth. As I walked towards Jasmine, I saw all the other parents crowding around Jasmine and congratulating her. WTF? This can’t be true. It’s… it’s impossible. That’s when I saw the screen. Jispa was in lane 3 and she was in second place. The touch pads showed the result. Something happened and Jispa must have stretched her last 5 meters to beat the the kid by 20 micro seconds, one fifth of a second. JISPA WAS GOING FOR HER NATIONALS TO BANGALORE! THAT’S IT. JISPA HAS MADE IT.

WOW. She did it. She did it. Pune who came third did raise a formal complaint which was dismissed. The touch pad is it. She did it.

She would have been able to do it in a few more races if her tonsils had not acted up. But this was a moment to treasure. It was a big deal for all of us. A very big deal.

I am not so sure what chance she has at the Nationals. All the kids are within 1 second of each other. Jispa has only one event to concentrate on. One month to work on only one event – the 50M Back. That in many ways is a boon. So now she can work towards one stroke and one distance. I think that will now be her best chance. No distraction and a clear focus to achieve one event, one super burst, one chance for redemption and glory … hehehe… now I sound like chariots of fire. *theme music playing already*

So let’s see now. She also has her vacations going unlike the other kids which gives her the best platform to perform at the best platform she could hope for.

I keep telling her that her next few years might be the best yet. She has only had 6 months with the new training program. Imagine what a year or so would help her achieve. So there… I only hope that you enjoy the ride and don’t let the burden of expectations weigh you down.

Join the Gang...

The gross national product does not allow for the health of our children, the quality of their education, or the joy of their play. It does not include the beauty of our poetry or the strength of our marriages; the intelligence of our public debate or the integrity of our public officials. It measures neither our wit nor our courage; neither our wisdom nor our learning; neither our compassion nor our devotion to our country; it measures everything, in short, except that which makes life worthwhile. 

Robert Kennedy

It takes a politician to get the economist to see a saint. I think it’s a lovely quote. Like a perfect politicians quote. It takes something that everyone knows and misunderstands and then wraps a lovely story about what it is not and then completely drives it to the ground by measuring it against something it wasn’t meant to measure.

Gross national product or the GNP. I remember being in an interview once in my B school. I think it was a summer internship with Shoppers Stop. Shoppers Stop was a coveted item in my B school. One of the few companies that was respected in college and wanted to recruit from us. In the interview they had asked me what my favorite subject was. I had practiced the answer in my head. Economics. I knew that one. So great, what’s the difference between GDP and GNP. Huh? Nopes. I did not know that one. I suspect neither did the interviewer. No, I don’t have a story in where I gave an amazingly false answer and got through. I was rejected and failed to get through. How can you like economics and not know this basic difference. Hah!

I remember walking out and then later asking my friend who was an economics post grad.. so what’s the difference. He knew this and answered PAT. It went something like this ‘the GDP (gross domestic produce) is the worth of all the goods and services of Indian and foreign nationals residing in India while the GNP measures the same of all Indian nationals across the world. I haven’t forgotten that in 19 odd years, but I admit that I had to check the internet to ensure that I hadn’t gotten it wrong.

But still, much as I think the quote is completely out of context with GNP left defending what it was not meant to protect, I still love it. Yes, the infatuation for GNP number is possible stupid when you see only one number and try and measure it as a means to know your success. Economics is much different than that. There are various indicators that we must look at but I think GDP or GNP, or both together are still by far the most important numbers for an economist to track to get a fair first idea of the countries well being. Then the next could possibly be the Gini Coefficient. This one measures the inequality in the country. So while you are a great economy and produce truck loads of everything, the Gini coefficient help you understand the difference between making money and spreading it to everyone in your economy. If the Gini coefficient doesn’t improve with the GDP number, you are basically screwing yourself over by creating possibly a class divide in the country and possibly your country smacks of croony capitalism! Then you look at happiness indicators (which are as dumb or as smart as the surveys designed), or other metrics such as mortality, education, womens well being etc.

My favorite over the years is the simple metrics of how a society treats its women is possibly in my mind the best indicator of how a community or a society will develop. Keeping women out of the ambit of decision making, management and general freedom will doom a society faster than anything else. Since 25 years I have been seeing how women are moving the needle in India. From my batch of MBAs that passed out I see a smaller number of them working. Now I see more and more women who take career as a serious choice and not something that they have to do just to pass some time before motherhood takes its toll. They are taking active decisions and are part of the entire spectrum of the work force. I see women who are far more confident now than they were ever before. They move out and take their decisions. You meet some of them on the field and you can see that they are smarter, sharper and more confident of themselves.

It will take a generation for things to change and for a country as a whole, it will take a couple more. Culture is a huge thing and it takes time to change. There must be enough impetus, heros, role models and constant hammering for change to happen.

Today in the morning one the highway I saw a couple walking, with the male having his hand around the women. What was striking was that the couple belonged to a lower income demographic. Normally, this is not done. Earlier only the rich and the famous would do that (when I was growing up), then the young and the happening (like us in college), then it filtered down slowly. And finally – I see the young from a lower demographic doing it like the rich! Now the culture is changing. It takes  a lot. First it has to be cool and desirable behavior and then it gets caught in on popular culture icons, like movies and TV serials, then it moves down and vast. I remember seeing Haridwar many years ago and remarking that the kids from the villages seem to be wearing jeans and the girls are wearing it as well. These girls will grow up wearing jeans and change the lives for themselves and for their families as well.

Women must be encouraged to stand up and manage themselves. They possibly need a little help from the rest of society to help them integrate more easily, but then the sops must be slowly withdrawn. We don’t want them to be softened, we want them as one. No difference. Part of it all.

One small thing I managed to pull off. At Matunga Gymkhana, we are a bunch of men trying to manage the gymkhana. That’s because the rules are stupid. When a family takes membership, it takes it in the primary member’s name and then everyone else in the family joins in. The membership is taken as a single person but mentally everyone takes it as a family. Since the membership is the basis for eligibility for official posts, we have a situation where the management is all male affair. And it stinks. At least when the new restaurant was being designed, I managed to plant a seed in the minds of the powers that be to swap the loos. Give the bigger ones to the women. Surely they require more space. They need atleast two commodes and a lot of space to dress. We men just need a piss pot, one commode and a half mirror. We can manage just right. This got done and I think generations of women will not know who to thank for this small change in their lives at the Gymkhana.

Now my next one – to introduce an amendment that allows spouse of members to take official roles in the management of the Gymkhana. That would again go a long way in the long term management of the Gymkhana.  So the next time I have a suggestion from a woman, i can tell her, sure - we need people like you to help us do what you want us to do. Please join the gang! It will take time. but it will get there.