I was listening to a podcast. The podcast was about being
quiet. This was in an interesting program that I stumbled upon – it’s called the
TED radio hour. If you have been reading this blog then you must be familiar
with the TED videos which are a constant course of fantastic information. The speakers
there get 20 minutes at best and the successful ones become overnight worldwide
internet celebrities. This podcast takes
these interesting talks and makes a show by creating theme and getting two
three talks, stiches them and then supplements them by interviews with the
speakers. It’s quite a nice radio show. It makes commuting so much more
bearable.
A few days back there was a talk on quiet. It just talks
about being quiet and a few talks around it. A few interesting points did come
up. One of things I resonated with is the point of being an introvert versus
being an extravert. Today in offices or anywhere in social life, being an
extravert is being seen as a sign of strength. It’s good to be an extrovert. Leaders
are extroverts. We are taught in school to be an extrovert – go out and seize
the moment – talk to a 100 hundred people and taught confidently. Reach out and
blah blah blah. The speaker argues that in the modern world we have placed a
large amount of emphasis on being an extrovert and this is a modern phenomena. Just
about a 100 odd years ago there was an emphasis on character that is measured
and thoughtful and – introverted.
You know, I was always an outgoing extroverted guy. I couldn’t
keep quiet, was happy in the company of people and openly gave opinion on all
matters. Happy to take the lead in meetings, talk my mind and do all sorts of
stuff. The Quintessential extrovert. This
is what I was taught to do. There are marks given for class participation and I
would maximize them. In the last ten years after I started reading I realized that
I did not know so much, I taught myself the value of keeping your opinions to
yourself. Listen, actively listen! When listening, try and convince yourself
that the other person’s point of view is correct and important. This is a
difficult thing to do and it is extremely difficult for an extroverted person
who jumps to ideas and thinks fast. So my mind works fast and gets the point
and I have exhibit extreme impatience while talking…. Dam shit… this creates
more enemies and it creates mistakes and it leaves a lot of meat on the table that
must be heard completely to have impact in your head.
So its been a 360 degree change for me. While growing up the
role models for me were all extrovert but now the role models are in many ways
introvert. I am sure the right answer is between the two. I like to brood over,
quietly think, and relax in one place with a book. Speak to a few people only
on things that are interesting and people who are knowledgeable or thirsty for
knowledge. Its interesting how things change.
Two other things I heard on the same program – I knew this
story about George Mallory wherein he
was asked in 1924 –why he wanted to conquer mount Everest – He famously
retorted “because it’s there”. This is a legend amongst mountain climbers. There
is no other real reason to climb a mountain besides the fact that its there,
waiting to be climed. This question was asked to a tight rope walker who has
walked across various places without a safety net. He retorted with his
variation – “because it’s in there”. Which is also true. He does it because inside
of him there is something that is in there. Which I thought was cool.
The second thing I was inspired was by the speaker talking
about the importance of quiet time. It’s difficult for me to get quiet time.
But that is an excuse according to the speaker. If we get time for exercise or
going to the gym, then we can definitely get quiet time for ourselves to get
our mental balance right. Driving in an around Mumbai is a pain and a blessing
in disguise, depending on the way you look at it. I hate the commute but now it
has become an amazing opportunity to be in silence and listen to podcasts. I
guess podcasts aren’t necessarily silent hour. But it still beats talking to
people. I used to use this rule – listen while going to office and catch up on
the phone while coming back. Now when I am tempted to reach for the phone and
speak on the Bluetooth, I resist and decide to hold on to the podcasts. My
silence is golden, you can keep on talking.
My mother would die laughing if she ever read this piece. Her
youngest could never be silent and now he is preaching it like he has mastered
it. Bull shit.
