I have had a slightly disturbed state of mind. I did not really sleep too well and couldn’t really do the yoga properly in the morning. Sometimes when there are too many things on your mind, it doesn’t really work out well. I think for me I need to be in control of the situation. If I don’t have too much control over it and depend on others then the uncertainty bugs me.
One factor was that I was planning for a vacation in June. I am planning to go up north and catch some camping and rafting. I invited some really cool ex students of mine who have the travel bug. They are now not really students but good friends. There is of course the small matter of them calling me sir. But it’s developed into a healthy relationship of almost equals. Ten years of age difference when they were 18 is not the same when they are 25. I love to see them all grown up. So while planning the trip the budget seems to coming up a little higher. Especially since some of them are salaried and just about so, I was a bit unhappy with the way the budget seems higher. I wouldn’t want them to spend a bit higher just because I am a little soft and want to stay in slightly better camps. So that was one thing that got me thinking and sleeping while thinking is always a bad idea.
The second thing is that my team is under some stress. I have largely left them alone for the recent past and some issues seem to be coming up. There is a little bit of uncertainty and change involved with one person shifting to a new role outside of my team but within the company. There are other signs that foretell of a simmer within. Like the look that I got yesterday when I asked them to pack up for the day. They did not like it. Funny. It should be the other way around in normal times. Probably I might have missed a vibe or a sign or I might have been too arrogant, too sure or plain too lazy to see some signals coming. So that got me a bit disturbed. Its been playing on my mind since yesterday. And with this trip planning thing, my head is a bit muddled.
But like everything else, when its muddles you attack the issue and close it, at least mentally. So first thing I started attacking the budget issue with travel. With that out of the way I started attacking the team issue. a few chats, a little introspection etc later… it is time to go back to basics. Keep the objective right. Keep the employee interest in your mind, give them the benefit of doubt. Internally change. This can work when you have faith in the employee core. I have faith in my team. Its been painstakingly difficult to build and I am justifiably proud of them and my ability to build them. Of course having a dose of luck helped but there has been considerable effort to bring them together and happy and pushing them to perform.
So Doing what I do best. I cleaned the white board. My big whiteboard that is behind me is where I write down all the work that has to be done . it’s a simple case of KRA setting. KRA? Key result areas. One of my bosses just decided to implement this for his core team and hence even for my team. I was smiling as I have always led teams by wrtiien down KRA’s. only we did not call them that and we did not have a long drawn out process for them. We called it managing by white board. The to do’s are written down on the white board. You come for a meeting and I will only talk about the stuff written down. If it’s not written, don’t do it. Complete clarity of what is required to be done by me and you.
Hence when its time to get back to basics, I clean the whiteboard. Playing eth shiva from the trinity is sometimes critical. Time to time the board gets outdated and boring. It needs a fresh perspective and a fresh look. It can’t be done by keeping the stuff there. So call in the housekeeping. Yes only in India can you call housekeeping to wipe the board clean. I have blogged about this before. He came and did a cleaning that is in a way metaphorical and symbolic. And here you are. Clean board, clean mind.
I have taken pains to build the team and I am not going to let it go down so easily. I am still here and I am still in charge. I can’t be bogged down by this for long.
Many years ago in the MBA entrance interviews, I had tried to practice good answers to bad questions. One was name your good qualities. One word I had liked then and realise its significance now – resilience.
It’s by luck I chanced upon it. I think if you tell yourself enough about something, your minds will actually believe it and act it.
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