It can get frustrating shopping with Jispa. Not that I really blame her. It’s just that as parents we need to grow up. Jispa is nine years old and like a good nine year old she has an opinion. Whatever the reason, whatever the thought process in her mind… how can I fault her for having an opinion? She just can refuse to wear something out of the blue. So we always get her to choose her clothes. These days I have been trying to get her to buy a dress. Too much jeans makes a tom boy. She has very clear stuff that she would like to wear. Rule one – no sleeveless. I don’t know why… she never gives a reason except – just! And most of the pretty dresses are just that – sleeveless. So this time I really picked her brain and told her to explain to me why she doesn’t want a dress. I finally cornered her. She was not clearing her preference because if she explained to us what she wanted and Jasmine got something basis that then she would have to wear it, whether she liked it or not. So she and I got into a pact. I would only buy what she liked and she would not be pressured into buying anything. In return she will shop with me for a dress. I finally understood what she wanted.
She wanted a simple solid color dress. No frills, no stupid embroidery, no extra flowers or motifs, not too much flair. Basically a women’s dress and not some baby Barbie pink floral dress. I like that. That’s my girl. It’s a different thing that we never did get anything to that specification.
But I think I figured a little bit more about her. She does not immediately explain her mind. She thinks a lot. Many times I tell Jasmine that don’t take her answers or behavior at face value. There is a lot she doesn’t tell and her mind ticks faster than anything else Jasmine has ever experienced. Be aware of her insecurities; be aware that she thinks a lot. She thinks about what you might think basis the answer she gives. She is two steps ahead of you. Not in a shrewd selfish way, but in an acute perceptive way. How do I know all this? Simple – I remember my childhood.
Now I think I might have got her shopping pulse - How am I to get shopping with her without my brains being fried? This time we went shopping for an Indian dress at fabindia. A Salwar kurta. I led her to the place. Showed her the designs and we quickly agreed to a piece to which I quickly agreed. She is an action lady not a dainty girl with a Barbie purse. Jasmine keeps blaming me for making a tom boy of her. What I realized one day, is that possibly Jasmine is the one influencing her dress sense. Jasmine never wears a dress. On a daily basis she is a sloppy dresser, being in a track and t shirt through the day. What role model does she have at home. No lipstick, no make up, pants and t-shirts. Further proof – Jispa loves chapsticks and guess what – jasmine applies chapstick. Jasmine will definitely point at me for a lot of things, but I guess here – she underestimates her role as a role model as well. It’s impossible that I am the root cause of all evil :).
So Jispa found her single color salwar kurta and tried it out for me. Man, has she grown up, she looked nice and cute and grown up. I am finally coming to terms with her growing up. It’s difficult but I have no choice. It’s a funny uneasy balance. I push her to grow up and behave on so many things, and then she keeps reminding and fighting for us to recognize that she is grown up. Whoops. This is one tug-o-war.
Here is she… trying one for size. She finally picked this one. I really like this photo. I really love her. Gosh.
She wanted a simple solid color dress. No frills, no stupid embroidery, no extra flowers or motifs, not too much flair. Basically a women’s dress and not some baby Barbie pink floral dress. I like that. That’s my girl. It’s a different thing that we never did get anything to that specification.
But I think I figured a little bit more about her. She does not immediately explain her mind. She thinks a lot. Many times I tell Jasmine that don’t take her answers or behavior at face value. There is a lot she doesn’t tell and her mind ticks faster than anything else Jasmine has ever experienced. Be aware of her insecurities; be aware that she thinks a lot. She thinks about what you might think basis the answer she gives. She is two steps ahead of you. Not in a shrewd selfish way, but in an acute perceptive way. How do I know all this? Simple – I remember my childhood.
Now I think I might have got her shopping pulse - How am I to get shopping with her without my brains being fried? This time we went shopping for an Indian dress at fabindia. A Salwar kurta. I led her to the place. Showed her the designs and we quickly agreed to a piece to which I quickly agreed. She is an action lady not a dainty girl with a Barbie purse. Jasmine keeps blaming me for making a tom boy of her. What I realized one day, is that possibly Jasmine is the one influencing her dress sense. Jasmine never wears a dress. On a daily basis she is a sloppy dresser, being in a track and t shirt through the day. What role model does she have at home. No lipstick, no make up, pants and t-shirts. Further proof – Jispa loves chapsticks and guess what – jasmine applies chapstick. Jasmine will definitely point at me for a lot of things, but I guess here – she underestimates her role as a role model as well. It’s impossible that I am the root cause of all evil :).
So Jispa found her single color salwar kurta and tried it out for me. Man, has she grown up, she looked nice and cute and grown up. I am finally coming to terms with her growing up. It’s difficult but I have no choice. It’s a funny uneasy balance. I push her to grow up and behave on so many things, and then she keeps reminding and fighting for us to recognize that she is grown up. Whoops. This is one tug-o-war.
Here is she… trying one for size. She finally picked this one. I really like this photo. I really love her. Gosh.
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