talk to the MAN

We are professionals. I work in an office and in a large setup. I know what it is to make an organization move and I know how the inter-politics work. And thanks to a lot of wisdom gained I assume I might be smart enough to understand a little about how the market dynamics are.

Earlier when I would speak to an entrepreneur, I used to be a little … haughty… I guess. I probably thought that the entrepreneur would never know the real way a large organization works and the thinking we put into a product. I thought that we are as a tribe smarter than what he is. But over the years I have learnt to respect the wisdom of the businessman. Whatever little he knows has greater value than whatever much I might know. I realized that finally that is the guy who takes the risk fundamentally. He is typically closer to his customer and while he may not have any theoretical construct he makes up for it by having passion, drive and of course the associated headache.

So I find it funny when someone like him comes to take advice from me. I think there is an interesting creative tension happening. He knows his beans but at the same time he also knows that the guy on the other side has some secret sauce that he is eager to learn from. There are systems and processes that a big firm guy knows that an entrepreneur never is exposed to. Or basically learns the hard way. They struggle with this construct. Managing systems and processes while growing crazily is a  marathon task. Typically systems are put in place once the growth rate slows down. Because while you are growing there is no use of a system. A system would make you slower and less responsive to change and adaptation.

So when talking to a entrepreneur my premise is simple – he is always right. He will know more than you and will always be better informed. Even if he isn’t. Its actually not as complicated as it sounds. It’s basically the frame of mind I put myself in when I am talking to him. This way I don’t get too arrogant while talking to him and genuinely start listening to him. Because there are so many times that the guy must be actually doing things without even knowing he is doing it.  Only when you think in this manner can you really understand and dig for clues as regards his behavior. Only then can you have a conversation that is enriching to both. And advice is never what he should do – but it is always what I see with my limited vision. Things that have helped me in my daily life and from that it is up to him on what he wants to take. It is essentially the same thing when you talk to anyone else. You have to essentially talk your experience without really thinking that the same is simply transferable.

I love these businessmen who have set up their own businesses. They have a way of doing things that have got them this far. I love to see them think and see them wondering about change. Some are constantly looking to change and some are constantly trying to maintain status quo. If anything I get a great deal of learning from talking to them. They probably don’t know but I too look up to them in some way. Finally I too take risks on the job, large ones but I know that my risks are not threatening. Sometimes these guys have to take risks that will forever change their lives and possibly take them to a newer orbit.

Hence the premise is always simple – you are right. Now let’s see where we can go from here. Its funny how this has happened over a period of time in my life. When did I swallow my arrogance and when did I decide to move my thinking. Possibly it happened when I realized that I don’t know more than I know and that not all that you know is right. But chuck that.

Coming back, I have also learnt that theoretical constructs are still very valid to anyone. The more I have understood about them by teaching and applying them the more I realize the wisdom in them. Even unstructured situations and growth can be better managed and understood if you have a lens through which you see them. There is wisdom that people have gathered over the years and they come out in these theories that are being made. The trick is to catch the theory, apply, seek for deviations and trust yourself enough to wonder why the deviations occur when they shouldn’t.

I have applied certain theories more than others and more I apply the more I see them (certain ones) as being right. it has improved my understanding of them. The problem is when I have to explain them to the entrepreneur he finds it difficult to catch them. In fact he tends to dismiss them as theories so I have to do the difficult thing and don’t present to them as such. I have to push them in different ways and lead to the same result. It’s a very difficult job. An entrepreneur typically knows his current problem and whatever you say he is constantly trying to find the solution to that problem. He is hunting for solutions to the problem he sees and therefore quickly loses interest if it does not fit or quickly catches a solution he sees a fit. They are always thinking fast and I find it difficult to hold intense conversations with them which require deep thinking about a particular issue. They are used to fast processing…. Quick in quick out kind of processing. I think at first I would try and catch them with a 100 different cases and possibly try to dazzle them with knowledge. But that is of no use to him. So I talk to him, understand from him and then try and just have a simple conversation using his examples and words. This way we possibly reach a better solution that is truer to his real problem.

They learn more from heart to heart conversations than from gyan distribution sessions. The gyan shit is needed for the MBA trying to look smart but the real work is needed by the business man to stay alive, relevant and promising. It’s the real thing man.

its the pain

It’s always the classic. In the quest for finishing the urgent we often don’t have time for what is important. The last couple of years we have had a good slowdown and that meant poor marketing had very little to do. I think I was lucky to have a mind in those years. Those were the days of going home early and spending time with family and ofcourse writng the blogs. I managed to write one blog for every day I was in office. I think the writing made me a better person, in some obscure, self reflecting kind of way. Also I think it has made me a better parent by forcing me to think through my own principles and ideals. And I also managed to discover the power of using RSS. I have been through slowdowns before in my career. I know that the best way to use the slowdown is to really focus inward and try as hard as possible to keep learning and improving yourself. It worked for me in the last year or so. Now that the slowdown is easing off, the pressure on work has gone through the roof with tons of work hitting. Everyday I come in and think about putting in my blog entry and I tread back home unsuccessful. Sometimes I miss the blog writing bit so much. There is so much to write about and there are so many incidents that I wanted to save for later.
Jispa’s school elocution contest was one such incident. It was that time of the year again. We search Shel Silverstien for interesting poems that Jispa could learn and recite. Interesting ones that give adequate tone variation that allow for an interesting learning experience. A twist in the end is always welcome. This year we got her to learn the one titles ‘Sick’. As usual Jasmine’s job was to get her to learn it and my job was to infuse life in it. We worked with Jispa for around a month on this. We had to submit the poem well in advance to the school. On the Friday before the Thursday, on which she had to recite, the teacher told her to change her poem. She asked her to recite the one she had learnt for the interschool competition, last year. That one was Lester. Oh god. And this was when I was in an offsite to Bangalore. So I couldn’t really work with her on the poem as well. But we tried to do our best in the ensuing days and we got her to match readiness. Jasmine and I also decided to register our protest, so we decided to pick her on Thursday and talk to the teacher. We sent that day to realise that Jispa won the third prize. We still made our point to the class teacher and sent the message that we hold the elocution close to our hearts and we believe in taking active part in it. The teacher said that she realised as Jispa told her that we had been practicing for over a month :).
In evening I spoke to Jispa. Did she enjoy the contest? Ya. Did she enjoy learning and reciting the poem? Ya. And after the contest what did you do? “I went and congratulated all the other kids who took part. Especially those from my class.” “Hmm.. why did you do that?” I asked. “because I remembered what you said. to always tell others that they did well, whether I win or lose”. Wow. I felt good. That’s my girl. I must have drilled the sportsman’s anthem into her. It is the way you play your game. So we might have been happy that she won, I tried not to show too much elation. Only happiness. But I really was happy and I told her as much that that is more important than winning.
On teaching…and coaching… I have tried to teach her an interesting new concept that seems to have worked for me. Visualisation. She is learning her swimming well and this Saturday there are trials for the next level. Jasmine is quite irritated that she has progressed well but she seems to keep forgetting certain basics. Cup your hands, reach out and hear your biceps and breathe right. I learnt this stuff from this movie ‘Pride’ and it is similar to what her coach tells her as well. Reach out. Visualisation is something I have learnt in cricket and adapted to my swimming as well as squash. If you are able to think through the technique you can mentally tune yourself to play those shots and they are easy in real life. Same with swimming. I have learnt to swim better purely by thinking about it. So I tried to teach her to think about the swimming technique, cupping hands, reaching out, breathing well. It seems to be working but you never know. We are keen that Jispa takes up swimming well. That would improve her technique, stamina and strength. It also seems to be the thing that we have the right support system for.
She seems to be something of an athlete in the making for now. Its definitely early days and she hasn’t really met competition but I guess the discipline of serious practice and commitment will take her a long way. It is so important to take up any sport in a proper structured manner. I was talking to her on the value of pain and the fact that serious athletes feel pain and befriend it. I told her about a story about Ian Thorpe and that he said he missed pain the most, now that he wasn’t training professionally. The joy that pain gives is something else altogether. Many people ask me what I get standing in the sun for a cricket match and I am not even playing any where near professional. Well, it’s the joy of pain. You can only experience it to know what its like. I hope Jispa experiences it as well.

its in the schedule

There are so many demands on daily life, it is important for a schedule to be in place. otherwise I guess its just impossible the demands of conflicting priorities. Once in place also the schedule makes for certain rigidity that my anti establishment tendencies find pretty irritating. Right now I am at 35 managing to find a balance between the two. But my daughter at 8 is another thing altogether.
She wants to do a lot and she clearly enjoys it tremendously. But it drives jasmine up the wall. Till now the pressure of school work was minimum but slowly as the pressure cranks up the walls seem to be bulging.
Jispa has her reviews happening. A lot of school work faces two kind of responses. Jasmine who wants it to be given due importance and me… who couldn’t really care less. I prefer sweating over the creative and fun stuff. The elocution competition, the sports day, the taekwondo kicks, creative writing etc. but math and Hindi are still there in the curriculum when I last checked and we still count those marks for promotion. So I guess that’s a given. So every time Jasmine will be stressing out on the math and Hindi and I will be like – let it be, let it be. And when it comes to the other stuff, I am in complete command with Jasmine only overseeing.
I also realise that jasmine is right. So it makes for an interesting balance. Otherwise both of us would have gone completely bonkers and taken Jispa along with.
So right now in the middle of all her activity we are struggling to find time for practice for her. How so we squeeze in time for her school practice as the reviews have started and how do we find time for her guitar practice, without which it’s pretty much impossible to learn the instrument.
I was trying to understand the schedule. I have learnt that it only works if it is a part of the schedule that is followed everyday. Jispa is also a dreamer. Someone who thinks of interesting things all the time. The imagination will always be in hyper mode. I get my best ideas in the shower or when I eating or doing something of a routine. It’s not a get over with it attitude but the brain starts functioning overtime and its gets lost in its thoughts. Jispa does that and bang…. There goes the schedule. The morning is a special pain. So I did the next bets thing. Disciplining my self to wake up on time. If I don’t wake up on time, I can’t wake her on time and then we are constantly rushing.
If the waking time is crunched and the shower hits the face fast enough rest of eth morning is much better. Jispa will get at least 30 minutes to practice everyday and I can use that time to also read. The key is to get all ready by 7 am. It happened today but I am not overtly bullish on it happening everyday. She got her practice time for a good 30 minutes. Here is a pic of her practising the guitar today morning.


Today while reading in the morning I came across what John Wheeler said – “Everything important, at the bottom, is essentially simple.” This was not a philosophy book but a physics book and this was in the chapter that was talking about quantum physics. But I couldn’t agree more. Most of the smartest people I met have said the same thing. If it is too complex it cannot be right. My best marketing teachers have always said that. Last week I saw a play on the life of mathematician Ramanujan. They also said something to the effect that – a mathematical equation has to be beautiful. Beauty lies in simplicity not complexity.
Most of all that we see or face – the answers lie in simple steps or terms. Can we have that one lens (Thank you Dharen for this example) through we which we can see everything and make sense of the complex games at play. Can we understand it so well that we can explain it to our mother (thank you prof Navalkar for this example). But essentially we only know it well if we can explain it well enough that a child could possible understand it.
I love it when Jispa asks me questions. It gives me great pleasure in explaining stuff to her. Yesterday she was talking about how stickers stick but don’t stick on the paper it comes in. interesting question. In trying to help her understand it I think I too cleared my mind on it. She then gets encouraged to ask more and more. What fun. I love this bit of parenting as well.
This too is only possible if I fit the schedule. Most of our father daughter interaction happens in the morning when I get to drop her to the bus stop. It get as high as the history of Indo Pak relations to something that is as sublime as sailing paper boats on the roadside streams near the bust stop. The latter is of particular interest to us and we hope for a decent stream everyday.