aaj darshan kare hum

In 1975, two legends were released.

Sholay will always be the ultimate epic of Bollywood, with amazingly well etched out characters and some lovely acting. For years, the characters were used to sell products or crack jokes. It was the ultimate super movie. The other legend was born 5 days later – me. Hah.

The other legend was Jai Santoshi Maa. This was a crazy dumb ass of a mytho meets current life movie in which the harassed but sweet as a daisy female protagonist gets her due. It set off the Devi Maa frenzy into the country with the Santoshi Maa fasts being the thing to do for all ails.

I remember seeing some parts of this movie and bloody hell grew up listening to these songs everywhere. My memories of these bhajans/ devotional songs are of a young kid, images of mother, festivities and dandiya being played. All this interspaced with images of being in Dubai. So it’s a weird combination of sands, air conditioning and parents from a low angle (I was a toddler remember). Writing this blog brought back memories which I now hereby share with you. Here listen to this.

The 70’s and 80’s dandiya beat hitting your head in a rhythmic frenzy. The gujju in me is awakened, albeit temporarily to this beat, wanting to take two bamboo sticks in hand, hold them gingerly in the middle, as I swirl, flirting with my fiancee, making eye contact, briefly and then smiling in acknowledgement, only to turn and twirl again, as fast as possible to catch her glimpse again. Hahahaha. Writing this was funny as it was only half in jest. The greatest memory of my marriage ceremony was the dandiya function which was held by Jasmine’s kutchi family in the true traditional style. I am dying to have a dandiya function like that again. Once more. With Jasmine. We had the best of times dancing to each other’s rhythm. Its been a long time since we danced like that together. I am sure her dancing legs will instantly activate on hearing the beats and seeing the ground set up. AH.

Jai Santoshi Ma was one the biggest hits of the year, holding its own story of love and piety against the simmering anger of Sholay and Deewar. For years, later Bollywood looked towards the feminine divine form for redemption, intervention and inspiration, torturing us with unbelievable stories at the climax, cheating us of logic and plotline. Man a crazy mind f*&K it was.

But who am I to criticize an era, especially since it etched me and gave a lot of my childhood, waiting for some Maa to save me from my Maa when I screwed up ;).  Yesterday I watched my own Jai Santoshi Maa and took my family along for the torture. It was a homage to the God who delivered us our aspirations and rode along in the journey from an awkward teen unsure about my future to an adult with faith in India and its ability to shine at the world stage. This God of India had people waiting for him wherever he went, he could do no wrong, no false step and conjure up magic from anywhere. His mere presence was enough to believe in hope. His name… you have to chant it, the way the world chanted it – SACHIN, SACHIN, dhad dhad dhad (three beats or claps or whatever you could do with any percussion in row, fast). No one made it up nor taught it to anyone; it was automatic and spontaneous from a crowd that was as a whole in dervish whirl to start with.

It was a documentary on the life of Sachin Tendulkar that I inflicted upon my family. It was horrible and disgusting, with no hope of getting any balanced view or insight. It was shit to start with and to finish with. When you have lived in a fish bowl for 30 odd years, not much is not known about you, much you can still try to extract insights from your journey that can be passed on to the youth to whom life may a pitfall be.

(This chasm, that has been naught to me,
To that fair-haired youth may a pitfall be.
He, too, must cross in the twilight dim;
Good friend, I am building this bridge for him)

Only if you were a die hard Sachin fan would you like this movie. Which I admit, I did. It moved me and brought out some real emotions in me. It ended with his retirement speech during which I could help but cry. Sachin had out stayed his cricket by a couple of years and he was at the end, a shadow of himself but still a force to reckon with. He always played his best at the world cups and the whole country wanted to win one for him. In the end when he had his last chance and we won the cup, it was because the team unlike the past did not depend on him to win it for them, but they wanted to win it for him.

But still, since he was two years older than me, his destiny was tied in with me as we saw a childhood of less to an adulthood of plenty, as we transitioned the economy to global inter connects and brashness of action but with a demeanor (almost false) of humility and good luck. In many ways, this 390 bucks that I spent on three tickets was my last piece of homage to the man who brought me endless hope, belief and joy. How can I explain when God hits a ball in the air and your hearts jumps with a weird type of joy and scare at the same time? Is it a six or will it be out. Should I leap in joy or should I hold my heart till I see the ball clear the fence (invariably). Oh god. How do I explain this?

But it still was a bad documentary. One sided and – ya – my era’s Jai Santoshi Maa where in the end, divine intervention solves everything! Here watch this, but go fast to the 6 minute mark when divine happens, or don’t say I did not warn you.

If you have belief and submit yourself to the higher lord then you will be delivered! JAI SANTOSHI MAA

And here see this miracle. When we as nation were facing the our fears, with Shoaib, the fastest bowler in the world, coming charging down on a hard wicket, bowling fast and Sachin hitting him for six with a shot never seen before by his devotees. That shot will forever be etched in my memory. This one comes in the one minute mark itself in the video. Have fun. But come on, don’t insult the devotee and go forward. See all his three miracles of the world cup.

See this one at the 4min:38second mark. That defined the God forever as it was against another God in this mega inter galactic battle

And I also know where I was on 27^th March 1994. I was in Panchgani in a hotel room when I woke up early to watch the match with dad as we saw Sachin open the innings for the first time to give Darshan and forever change the pecking order of the batting Gods of India. He sowed the opening the batting with the field restrictions is all about the gaps the aerial shots. We all wanted his century so much and it was so disappointing when he got out to a soft dismissal.

But here. The God has long retired paving the way for the others to follow. Creating an era as he walked on the 22 yards. And I paid my dues by watching his shitty documentary. I will always be beholden to him but at least my dues are paid, with money in the donation box.

But while going, listen to this aarti and then go please.

Jai jai Santoshi maata jai jai maa…. Jai jai Santoshi maata jai jai maa…. Jai jai Santoshi maata jai jai maa….Jai jai Santoshi maata jai jai maa….

tendlya gaya

Last week we had the grand retiring of Sachin Tendulkar. Arguably amongst the greatest batsman to have played the game, I had wondered for many years what would happen to the Indian cricket team when this man retires. I explained the significance of this man to my cricket entertainment and what he meant to me.

I remember first reading about Sachin in the papers when this young school boy smashed to a world record partnership in a school match. He and Vinod Kambli plundered a hapless bowling attack and were heralded as the great potentials for international cricket. Then he got chosen to play Ranji and the Irani trophy ties where he smashed another set of runs. For us Sachin was our prodigy, our Bombay boy who we all owned a part of. We were instrumental in his success. We wanted him to play for India as soon as possible and the newspapers reflected our opinion which was taken note of by the selectors. That was our dream. He was our favorite son.

We followed him to Pakistan and I still remember the way he tore Abdul Qadir, the legendary leg spinner in the one day match and announced his arrival to one day cricket. Our family was very clear – here was the greatest champion of world cricket. He was here. I have great memories of watching cricket with my dad, spending full days watching a game of cricket on TV. India were a  bunch of high potential losers. We were too soft to play the new age of cricket. We had talent but as dad would often say – no temperament. Till we had Sachin. In ODI’s he would come in at 4down or 5 down and get a limited number of overs to play. I remember dad and me clamoring for Sachin to open the innings. And lo behold. I remember waking up early morning in a Panchgani  hotel room to see Sachin walk in and destroy the bowling attack. He used his technique to play lofted shots and forever imprinted himself on the game. And then came the era where we only had hopes on one man. We would get in watch till he got out. I remember having the greatest of stress while he was batting. On one hand you would enjoy his batting and the fact that he took the bowling to shreds but at the same time you knew he could not get out. If he did – we would have no hope left. We would lose the match, the plot and our pride. It was him that the entire hopes were pinned on. I remember my brother and me hanging our heads in disbelief as he would get out. Match is over. I remember seeing the wild frenzy of the opposite team as they did a naked dance and celebrated wildly as they got the man.  It was clear why the entire 22 men were on the field. 11 to get him and another 11 to keep him there. And the world was watching who would win – and when.

My dad was such a Tendlya fan that even when the maestro was on bowling side, he would insist that the ball be given to him while bowling. He was convinced that some magic would happen, and invariably it did. He would pick a wicket, stop the flow of runs… whatever. He would bowl legspin to a right handed batsman and switch to off spin for a leftie. He would bowl seam up and swing it both ways. What a guy. He was born to play cricket. I remember when he suddenly started sweeping. It was something he started later in his career and I remember when he first played a reverse sweep. The result was a boundary (against South Africa).

He gave us such joy, such a joy! Statisticians have commended and condemned him at varying intervals. People hated him later and called him selfish. There have been many undercurrents. I surely stopped arguing with them. Sachin was not a number to me. No number would suffice for the man. I don’t even care about his test cricket. For me it was his one day cricket. I thought that was the only thing he born to play. He was the poster boy of the generation to which I belonged to. Being two years elder to me our growing up has run parallel. I grew up with him and I feel I too have a hand in his fame, fortune and run of luck and form. Being a Mumbaikar Sachin is my brother, my loved one – who taught the world that you can be technically correct and yet score fast and be a joy to watch, that you can be calm and yet very aggressive, that you can contribute by your enthusiasm and your verve. Even though you might never be a gifted fielder but you try hard at what comes your way and yes – your throw will always be hard. No soft throws.

My captain always taught me – look at Tendulkar play. He hits the ball and does not eye ball the bowler. He simply looks down and almost apologetically taps the pitch. It’s like he is saying ‘sorry, shot lag gaya. Ball aisa tha, shot toh lag gaya’. No chest thumping, no blood letting, but mind you – he wanted to win as badly as anyone else.

The other thing I learnt from him is that if you are a great payer – the same qualities will make you a bad captain. On his retirement people opened up and admitted that as a captain he would expect the same from others. For someone who is a natural at things, its impossible to explain or motivate someone to do something. The genius refuses to understand whats so tough. Lesser mortals cringe and awe at achievement.

Some things may easy to me. They were simple when I did them. And it irritates me no end when I see my team not being able to understand it. I learnt that while they can’t do the same, they can do something else that I could never.  Captainship is about patience and lifting your team to do beyond their abilities not match up to yours. Your ability is not the point here. It doesn’t count. What counts is the team. The team must work together and play above the weight. Sachin, in his failings also taught me that. You can’t be hanuman and you can’t win on your own.

Finally I am sure the stats will show that whenever we relied too much on one man – we invariably lost. For all his brilliance he never won us the world cup. We won it when he was just one of the spokes of the well-oiled machine – important but the only keystone. When the rest of the team looks at the man for inspiration and not awe – when the team is happy to have him and not solely dependent – when everyone knows their role in relation to the game and not in relation to the man – that is when magic happens.

Good bad – I have a strong personality. It weighs in on the team at many times. I have learnt to control it a fair bit, reign it in but more importantly give power to the second in line to lead. To push the boundaries of their own, in their own identity.

Sachin was a genius who held our hearts with amazing care. But that was his failing as well. He knew, we knew he could do it – that’s why most of the time he might have failed. You might be the greatest ever but it takes 11 to make a team. All 11. And you cant pull it for long. Even the best have to just do their bit… the rest pulls it alongside.

I really love him and I can’t really see the criticism of the man’s averages. Playing and playing when you can’t get out is something stats will never capture. Understanding the role of a batsman when you play is something stats can’t ever decipher. Stupid people.

You don’t mess with Tendulkar you miss with my memories, my hope, my life.

This may be an automated marketing gimmick from BCCI but to me and his family - I think this is the best i have seen. it means a lot for some stupid emotional reason. Thanks dude.

thanks tendlya

Today went by with me thinking many times on what on earth to write. Some times I have been woefully short of ideas and material. But over the last one year, I have been writing an average of one blog for every day that I have come to office. I think this started from Feb 09. A lot of entries have been rambling, a few funny, a few recorded Jispa’s growing and a few were, to my mind, deep. But write I must. I think having this discipline is important over a long period of time. The primary aim of this blog is a legacy and that’s the only way to nurture it. So write I must.
I had hardly anything to write about till around a few minutes back. I was lucky to be in office today while he scored those runs. With no TV at home, office time cricket is the only time I get to catch up with the game.
Sachin scored the worlds first double century today. For someone who grew up watching this man play for India, it is an emotion that is unparalleled. It was something that I always had in my heart. The first that somebody must eclipse the record Saeed Anwar scored against India. He had batted with a runner and I am sure my entire generation found that unfair. The second is that I wanted Sachin to do it, with 200 runs.
We grew up watching him bat all alone, holding up the entire team. These days India has many stroke players and finisher. In those days it was him alone. I remember some great days watching him bat with my dad and all of us cheering and screaming together at home and the deathly silence that shouted in the home and stadium alike when he got out. I relive all those emotions when I watch Sachin bat, I remember my dad. We both were ardent Sachin fans. When I see Sachin bat I can feel the excitement I shared with dad watching cricket. I remember the stress that we carried together and the silent despair we shared when he got out. Those were the best of times I have had with dad. I am sure he would have been thrilled to see this knock. While Sachin scored all the runs, on a personal level I dedicate this knock of his to my dad.