grace

2010 is a good time to write some end of year bores. You get them in all papers and just about everywhere. I can’t read one more story on New Year resolutions. But since it’s also the end of a decade, a lot more newsprint gets devoted to rubbish sepia. But for me the year end would mean something special always. This date acts as a proof in my life that being brave and stupid is better than being scared and intelligent. Discretion is not the better part of valour. It was on this date 20 years ago, I first spoke to Jasmine; and the first words were something of a proposal.
After which I have always told would-be-Romeos and would-be-Juliets that if it is in your hearts, bring it to your lips. Better to speak out your heart and face rejection than to think of what could have been.
As a 14 year old my heart was pumping hard and my hormones clouded my brain and I still sometimes wonder what my dad would have done to me if Jasmine had complained instead of being sweet. Also now I wonder what would have happened if I had a tight slap in return? But life knows its destiny and it hurtles towards it. (wisdom of oogway). Just for the record she refused and it took another year and more of following to finally wriggle a yes. (Tenacity? but that is another story).
So I can look back on twenty years and wonder about the various phases we have had together. The first four and half years of being together but hiding from her parents. The next few of being together but slightly unsure about how our life will unfold in terms of career etc. The next few of setting it up. Then Jispa and then the least three years of staying and setting up our nuclear family.
Superficially we are very different but at so many levels we are the same. There seems to be no set formula or philosophy to make it work. I think all it needs is the will to make it work.
God has been good so far. We sometimes wonder when, with him, we will find ourselves afoul.