Listen to this
I asked Jispa whether there was a song stuck in her hjead
this time around. She said ‘no’. normally she hates me singing and especially
before a swim. She says that the song gets stuck in the head and she finds it
extremely irritating. And if I sing it then it gets stuck in my ugly tune. So
she hates hates it. Normally I like to irritate her and continue to sing till
she gets really upset but this time I didn’t dare to try. This time my baby was
participating in the ultimate swim marathon. This is the third or fourth year
that she has had the chance to take part. The last three years, something or
the other had always come up. A cousin’s function, school sports day…
something. This time she was it.
But since she has had a shoulder injury she hasn’t been
training as intensively as before. So no morning swimming and a lighter
workout. Around ten days back while I was discussing with the coach he had told
me that he is sending Jispa for the marathon. That’s cool by me. I did not
think much of it. I assumed Jasmine knew and I thought it was some time away.
Jasmine came to know only a couple of days earlier and she was quite hyper. A
MARATHON and I don’t even know she is participating. She went into overdrive,
read all she could and tried to be ready for it.
For me the holy grail of all sports is not the sprint but
it’s the marathon. A test of brute will power. The ability to keep fighting
yourself, your muscles and your mind. A lot of things that keeps telling you to
stop and something that keeps telling you to go on. I have run a few long
distance runs especially thanks to the NCC training I got. The longer the
distance the greater the will power needed. You are essentially running
yourself. There is hardly any competition that you see. I had told Jispa that
to my mind this is the best race for me. I will be by your side. We were held
up in traffic and we missed the first time trial and we caught the second one.
Jispa very easily lapped her nearest competitor. Then the girl in the lane next
to her tried keeping pace with Jispa even though she was 50 meters down
compared to Jispa.
Jispa started very well, she paced herself and took easy
strokes and at a pace she thought she could sustain. I spoke to her coach and
we agreed that it was sign of a strong mental makeup. Normally I don’t cheer,
but this was a long race. 160 laps of a 25 meter pool. She went on and on. I
saw that she saw me looking at her and I tried cheering her, egging her on.
Before the race I had told her that I would be busy playing temple run. If you
see me waving my phone at you then it means I am playing temple run while you
kill yourself in the pool. Good natured laughing and ribbing later, while she
walked to the starting block, she told Jasmine to tell me not to make her
laugh. So when I was cheering her with a phone in my hand, I saw her laughing.
Her coach told me ‘she is laughing’. “ya, that is at me. There are many
pressures already on her. At least I removed the one that a father puts. We are
having our private joke’.
It’s a fine line putting pressure and asking / pushing your
child to perform. I told her it’s important to race this one, don’t worry. I
was sure she could do it but at the same time I explained to her “see, if it
pains think a little. If your muscles are paining, then carry on, that’s a good
thing to fight. But if your shoulder injury acts up then stop immediately. You
don’t want to injure your shoulder. Its ok.” but I wanted her to compete and
wanted her to finish. So we kept cheering her on. She kept looking at me and I
kept walking along the sides, making actions, urging her, asking her to
stretch. In the middle she was telling something to Jasmine. I went to one end
and she shouted out to me – its cold. Winter in Mumbai and we had unseasonal
rain that day. The weather was cold and the Khar swim pool where this was held
is on the third floor, near the sea line. This is known to be the coldest pool
in Mumbai. I kept saying, its ok, fight it, it’s worth it. I not sure how much
of my shouting she registered but she surely could see me encouraging her.
She and the girl in the lane adjacent kept pace with each
other. Both trying to shake the other one out, pushing each other. It was a
fine battle to be seen. But thanks to her start she was 50 meters ahead and it
stayed that way till the end. So in the second time trial she finished well
ahead of the pack. If we had made it in time she would swam with her seeds and would
have had a better timing. She finished fourth overall with a time of around 63
minutes. Wow. I know guys in my office (and chicks) who just wouldn’t be able
to even walk that much in that time.
But what struck me is that the other parents put so much
pressure on the kids. Some of the other medal winning kids were sitting glum.
Because their parents were unhappy with their timing. WHAT. I wanted to shove
them into the freezing pool and check their reactions. After Jispa came out she
said she couldn’t feel her arms. Her arms from shoulder to wrist were frozen
and she said in the middle of the swim she couldn’t feel them so she was
jerking and throwing them to wake them up. Now that builds character. She got
out and we rushed her to the changing room for her to relax under the hot
shower. In such circumstances can you say anything to your kid? I don’t know. I
can’t say thing else but ‘awesome job’. I cant understand, after completing a
swim like this shouldn’t you be basking and soaking it all in. After all you
just swam four kilometers in an hour.
I am sure if she had swum in the first time trail she would
have finished amongst the medal tally. But freaking cares that much? It’s ok. I
am happy. Possibly this was a blessing. This was good. At that level these kids
start pushing each other and the undercurrent of competitiveness comes out and
who know – an injury! So we are especially happy parents.
I told Jispa “really well swum. And I don’t normally say it,
but yes, you swam really nice.”. She also said “ya, I know you normally don’t
say it. Thanks. You really liked my swim”. “yes”. Awesome.
I asked her afterwards if she did see us. Yes. And she took
encouragement from us. she laughed as she thought I was teasing her with the
cell in my hand. Well I wasn’t, but hell, did the laughing helped? Ya. And the
walking up and down as well. That was like a pace clock. So that’s good. She
couldn’t hear anything but she knew I was encouraging her. Was that good – yes
it was perfect. Thanks. And at the end – was there a song stuck in your head.
No. then what were you thinking? I had told her to think of a marathon as a
meditation exercise. Keep trying to correct your position. See your arms, body
legs. Keep swimming and try to be technically correct. Get your rhythm going.
She said “I kept thinking about my strokes and kept trying to keep them going
good”. What more can I ask for.
