This weekend we took Jispa (a few other friends joined in)
to Esselworld. Esselworld is an amusement park that has largely not reinvented
itself since it first opened… when did it open? Around 20 years ago, I assume. I
don’t remember too many changes in the park since I first went there as a
college kid. That was a fun thing to do. Go with the gang, and of course your
girlfriend. You like bumping into her when you sit at the dodge’em cars or at
the rollercoasters. It surely was a nice place to be away with your friends or
girlfriend in the good old days. Today at best what I can say about it… it’s a neat
place. It’s not a dirty place and over the years, I don’t think it has gotten
out priced and expensive.
But for me most of the rides have been completely closed to
me. I can’t handle any ride that takes people in circles. Any circle. Even the
sweetest, cutest and slowest of merry go rounds can get me queasy and likely to
puke within seconds. I can handle rollercoasters with jumps and dives and stuff
but just nothing round. The worst ride for me will be a simple cup saucer ride.
The whole ride goes circular and then the cups inside of it also goes in
circles. YUCK. Jamsine is blessed. She can happily go for any of these rides
and come out smiling or even bored. Jispa takes after her. She too can handle
as many circles as these stupid rides throw at her.
We have taken Jispa a couple of times to Esselworld before. The
last was about three years ago. I remember her enjoying the rides and I remember
me enjoying being with her. She would round and round on the merry go round,
and I would be the stupid father, going “aaaaa” and “booooo” and “ wheeee” from
outside the enclosure; shaking my hands wildly to get her attention and get her
to smile. Then we would put her on one silly ride after another, spending good
family time.
This time around at the entrance I should have known of what
lay in store for me. At first, I had to shell the full adult fare for her. ‘HUH?’
Full fare? Wow. She is now above 4ft 6in, which means she is now a full price
ticket with access to almost every adult ride. She beat it by a good two /
three inches. Cool. Inside, it wasn’t as if papa would be taking her
everywhere. She was going everywhere on her own with her friends. The ones that
go in circles for sure, but I was quite amazed how she was completely at ease
on her own in the dodge cars. She got into the car alone and she drove it all
alone. Wow. How did she learn to do that? Elder kids struggle with the cars. Invariably
there will be one adult stuck in the end with the car not moving. Without any instructions
she was driving steering and banging into everyone perfectly. She was aiming
the dam car right.
(thats her in the grey cap and jacket on the right)
Then followed the roller coaster. There too she was on her
own. Who needs dad? So was for the tornado and the big splash. DONE. I told Jasmine,
DONE. I am not going to go to Esselworld anymore. I always hated the rides, I hardly
had two three rides which I could sit on; I went for spending time with my kids
and here, I was completely …. not required. Really. It was so bad that in the
middle I actually slept off on the bench.
Jispa is now growing up, no… Jispa has now really grown up. It’s
difficult, but the faster we recognize that the better it is for us and her.
Both Jasmine and I need to step off the pedal and let be free. The good old
adage comes to mind – Permit where you can, protect where you must. Easier said
than done.
Yesterday at night while she was going off to sleep she was
protesting to me. She wants to enjoy her vacations but we are making her do
half an hour of writing and then some tables and some Hindi. All that her
school teachers asked us to do. I explained to her that she is now grown up.
Her teacher wants her to write fast, as that’s the only thing that an issue
with her. Her teacher says that next year, she won’t have the luxury of time. Her
Hindi teacher wants her to improve her vocab so she must read a few Hindi
books. And math tables are a bloody must – its even part of her summer
homework.
I explained that – she has now grown up. I explained that she
was on her own at the amusement park, wasn’t she? She doesn’t really need dad
anymore in the same way. Thus she has a lot more freedom and a lot more power,
and with it comes responsibility. No option.
She needs to study her stuff and write fast if she wants to do anything in her
life. I explained how 100 mark papers have to be finished in two and a half
hours. She needs to write fast. Then she asked me a basic question, why do you
give less time in the exams. Errr? “Good question Jispa. I also don’t know why
there is less time in an exam. Why would you need to write so much in so little
time? I also don’t believe it”
Why do we have these stupid exam formats? It’s not like one
more hour will make a bad student. Why are evaluated thus? Do we need a written
pressure exam to separate the wheat from the chaff? “sorry Jispa, that’s the
way it is. You will have to write fast for sure. And tables…. Tables are
amongst the most important thing you must learn. Here I can help, by taking
them up and making you learn, but rest… you are on your own in many ways. You will
have to do the stuff”. “ok dad”.
What to do. I can’t understand why they still give dictation
and notes in class. Just explain eth stuff, give out the notes and give us
home-work and stuff. Why should we write notes in class? Why? I remember
writing notes like crazy in school and college. There were limited text books,
especially in B school, no internet and definitely no money to get the notes
copied. But now all this is standard. But hell, we will still write and then we
will insist on good handwriting and give limited time in the exams. What yaar. Come
on. This shit must improve. How long can the education system lag. We are
teaching kids to only expect questions from question banks. We are teaching
them to learn by rote and we are definitely pushing them not to ask too much.
On asking… Jispa was asking me about my job. I was
explaining marketing to her. How marketing should work and the role of
marketing as opposed to simply advertising. How we must benchmark to the best
across industries etc… and one topic was left to be answered. I have to explain
to her this week about Sensex and Nifty. She heard it on TV once and she made a
mental note about asking her Daddy. Finally I am suddenly feeling important
after all. Dad seems to be in demand and of value. Otherwise the bloody Esselworld
experience was leaving my self worth and self esteem in tatters.
