I just returned from a vacation in Dandeli and Hampi. Of
late I have gotten into taking everything as a learning experience and
everything or every moment seems to be teaching me something. Possibly its only
my old brain getting into too much thinking or possibly because I have suddenly
decided that change is the new mantra. I have changed a lot in the last one
year. I have been at least for my standards much more patient and willing to
listen and understand the other side / point of view. I don’t know if its my
life stage or my job or the environment around me that’s changing me, but it
surely is.
WE went with a friend and she had her child along with us on
the trip. It took a lot of restraint from my side to stop fathering the child.
Trying to get the child into shape. I realize that is not my problem and it
shouldn’t be. A child is like what he is because of so many factors. Earlier I
would have made for a really bad ass travelling companion, trying to get every
child into mold by being a disciplinarian. I was an ass and I can’t undo
anything of that. But luckily this time around, I was less of one. I was much
more patient and happy. At the start I was getting into old habits till I
understood what I could or could not do. Even my friend was willing and would
have given me a free hand but in spite of that I controlled. I stood firm on my
stand and spread more love than discipline.
There are many factors that shape a child’s personality. Its
own intrinsic behavior, the rewards and the punishment that its gets as growing
up, the habits around the house, the behavior its apes, everything. And who are
we to decide what is the right way to behave. Especially on a short holiday.
Isn’t it enough that we are tyrants to our own children from the time they are
born? I am so sorry for all the tyranny I caused to everyone.
Being a dad earlier
in your life is a good thing. You can do a
lot of things with the child that only the power of youth can help, as I
will show you below… but it cant beat the older wisdom that comes with it. Possibly
that’s why the dad’s role is to be a younger friend and the grandad’s role is
to impart wisdom. Using patience and love. As I grow older I realize a lot of
the mistakes I made, but I would have only realized them thanks to making them.
So someone had to take the brunt of it. I guess this is the rule of life and it
is philosophized as karma. At an overall level, you get what you deserve and to
really rationalize it and balce it, you go back a few lives to get the
balancing figure for the shit you are getting. Haha.
Forget that … back to the fun stuff. I always wanted to do
stuff with my daughter. Go boating, rock climbing, exploring, swimming, diving
into the cold rivers… headfirst. Wow those were dreams, but now Jispa is old
enough to do some of them. In fact a lot of them got done this time around.
First one – Kayaking – we went kayaking into the rivers.
Just she and me. We even spotted a crocodile on the banks. It saw us and
splashed in. like idiots we went further till I got a little chicken and
decided to turn back. We were less than 15 meters away from where it was sun
bathing. It was a medium sized one at around 9 feet long. Jispa and I were
initially in different boats. She then got a bit tired and we got onto a boat
that had both of us. I told Jispa… it was dream to go kayaking with you, both
on individual boats and on a joint both. Exploring the river, seeing the wild…
and yes we even spotted a black capped kingfisher.
Here are pics…
Then another dream, diving into a river in the wild. Here
you are. In case anyone is thinking… yes it’s the same Crocodile River. The
crocodile was spotted by us on the opposite bank. Call us foolhardy, but it was
fun.
And the last – to go on the wild boulder mountains of Hampi.
My knee doesn’t permit us to do much of this. But we climbed our small hill and
waved out to mummy down below. Really small hill :). But it was a start. The next time I am in
Hampi, I am going to go in with a properly strengthened knee and going to spend
a day or two just climbing these monsters and walking around.
