there much more to a vacation than a vacation.

I just returned from a vacation in Dandeli and Hampi. Of late I have gotten into taking everything as a learning experience and everything or every moment seems to be teaching me something. Possibly its only my old brain getting into too much thinking or possibly because I have suddenly decided that change is the new mantra. I have changed a lot in the last one year. I have been at least for my standards much more patient and willing to listen and understand the other side / point of view. I don’t know if its my life stage or my job or the environment around me that’s changing me, but it surely is.

WE went with a friend and she had her child along with us on the trip. It took a lot of restraint from my side to stop fathering the child. Trying to get the child into shape. I realize that is not my problem and it shouldn’t be. A child is like what he is because of so many factors. Earlier I would have made for a really bad ass travelling companion, trying to get every child into mold by being a disciplinarian. I was an ass and I can’t undo anything of that. But luckily this time around, I was less of one. I was much more patient and happy. At the start I was getting into old habits till I understood what I could or could not do. Even my friend was willing and would have given me a free hand but in spite of that I controlled. I stood firm on my stand and spread more love than discipline.

There are many factors that shape a child’s personality. Its own intrinsic behavior, the rewards and the punishment that its gets as growing up, the habits around the house, the behavior its apes, everything. And who are we to decide what is the right way to behave. Especially on a short holiday. Isn’t it enough that we are tyrants to our own children from the time they are born? I am so sorry for all the tyranny I caused to everyone.

Being a  dad earlier in your life is a good thing. You can do a  lot of things with the child that only the power of youth can help, as I will show you below… but it cant beat the older wisdom that comes with it. Possibly that’s why the dad’s role is to be a younger friend and the grandad’s role is to impart wisdom. Using patience and love. As I grow older I realize a lot of the mistakes I made, but I would have only realized them thanks to making them. So someone had to take the brunt of it. I guess this is the rule of life and it is philosophized as karma. At an overall level, you get what you deserve and to really rationalize it and balce it, you go back a few lives to get the balancing figure for the shit you are getting. Haha.

Forget that … back to the fun stuff. I always wanted to do stuff with my daughter. Go boating, rock climbing, exploring, swimming, diving into the cold rivers… headfirst. Wow those were dreams, but now Jispa is old enough to do some of them. In fact a lot of them got done this time around.

First one – Kayaking – we went kayaking into the rivers. Just she and me. We even spotted a crocodile on the banks. It saw us and splashed in. like idiots we went further till I got a little chicken and decided to turn back. We were less than 15 meters away from where it was sun bathing. It was a medium sized one at around 9 feet long. Jispa and I were initially in different boats. She then got a bit tired and we got onto a boat that had both of us. I told Jispa… it was dream to go kayaking with you, both on individual boats and on a joint both. Exploring the river, seeing the wild… and yes we even spotted a black capped kingfisher.

Here are pics…

Then another dream, diving into a river in the wild. Here you are. In case anyone is thinking… yes it’s the same Crocodile River. The crocodile was spotted by us on the opposite bank. Call us foolhardy, but it was fun.

And the last – to go on the wild boulder mountains of Hampi. My knee doesn’t permit us to do much of this. But we climbed our small hill and waved out to mummy down below. Really small hill :).  But it was a start. The next time I am in Hampi, I am going to go in with a properly strengthened knee and going to spend a day or two just climbing these monsters and walking around.

and this one is just for kicks

and a few more

inspired by lion king

and - we are just another rock!

and this one is mildly inspired by titantic

adventure is thy name

Jispa learnt swimming and cycling ahead of her contemporaries. And generally she seems to be learning stuff faster. Are we to be praised? While I would take some credit but a lot goes to her. As a child I feel she is more open and adventurous, she is ready to be pushed out of her comfort zone. I do see a sense of adventure. It’s not that apparent but on prodding it does come out. She is not the kid who will happily be in her comfort zone ignoring the fun happing around. She is willing to go in pursuit. She picks these cues of adventure from others and continues on. She learn to not find earth worms yuck thanks to her cousin, she loved dogs and petting them from her kaki, and so on. I keep pushing her. I finally once got her to touch a snake at a zoo and at a snake catchers place. So now smaller insects etc don’t bother her too much as well. The other day we were trying to get an earthworm onto our hands. I would hate to grow up to be an ‘eeeeeee-aieeee-its- a-worm’ type of girl. She is literally named for adventure. I would love her continue that streak. Jasmine hates this animal lover stuff. She can’t touch random insects. I am normally ambivalent about these things but thanks to Jispa I am getting I push myself.
Ability to move out of your comfort zone regularly is a wonderful quality she has that I would like to hone and develop. Keep going.