It’s been a really uphill struggle to remain fit and
fighting. My bad right knee keeps getting dislocated at the slightest stress. I
strap it heavily to play badminton and yet in some vague situations, snap it
goes. Now I am used to the drill, it will dislocate and then I will fall and
then I will be in grave pain while I straighten my knee and snap, straightening
it will get it into place and I can be normal again. But I still wont be able
to run hard.
Its seriously my worst nightmare coming true. One of my recurring
nightmares has been that I can’t run, a train is running away and I can’t run
fast enough to catch it. This nightmare is something that I am living. Running and
turning fast and long has been very important to me. And that has stopped. But I
am surprised at myself. I have adapted very well. I started badminton instead
of squash. It’s easier on the knees and I swim, that’s easiest on them.
Last week, I played a cricket tournament in my colony. I was
in the team on reputation I guess. The senior pro who talks like he knows it
all. I am still good on the field as a thinker. I may be a better player thinking
through the game. I resisted from giving too many comments upfront, but when we
lost one match and every one blamed it on bowling, I stood apart and explained
how we lost it on batting. We overhauled the batting order and style and
smashed through the next couple of games. I was sent in early, in spite of me
explaining that I can’t run. I smashed one straight six off the ground and
established my reputation. The next match I then destroyed my reputation. Well,
almost. I am done with cricket. I dislocated my knee playing a shot, not even
running. I retired never to bat again. And my back is sore form the wicket keeping
I had to do. That was the only spot available to fielders who can’t run. So now
after giving away my kit, I even gave away my bat. Only if it stays out will I not
be tempted to play again. I loved my bat. My daughter was asking me if it was
my lucky bat. No, I don’t believe in lucky bats but I did have a bat with an
amazing balance, weight and power. I have hit a six over covers with that bat.
But I knew I had to give it away. Its time. I explained to Jispa that when I was
younger – around 25 yrs old, I always wished I had a great bat. Now I have a
friend who is that young and plays cricket and he deserves a bat that is this
good. What will it do in my house. Let him use it and let him get what I didn’t.
I am happy. I may have gotten old and crippled but I haven’t
lost my touch with my emotions. I am happy that I have the heart to give away
my equipment while they are still in good condition. And truly give them away,
without having any condition attached to them. The only condition I attached to
the bat was that – please love it. Respect it. I need not have said it. The boy
who took it really loved it and was excited by it. NICE. It’s nice to see such
joy. I know what I might have felt to get such a fantastic bat.
So here I am retiring almost from all forms of the game. I am
not even fit to play colony cricket. For now atleast. It’s time to swim I guess.
Swim and make your muscles. I can’t stay away from a sport. I can’t become round
and happy. I have to remain straight and fit.
In swimming I learnt all the four strokes, though not all
proficiently… but I know them. Only one thing remains – the tumble turn. Jispa
is after me to learn it from her. I hate it as whenever I try it, I lose all
orientation and water enters my nose giving me a fizzy head. But I have to try
it, once that’s done, a big dream will be done. And what better way to fulfill
your dream than having your daughter helping you along the way.
