Nirvanic walks

Huffff… yesterday I was a bit later than usual coming into office. As I hit the bus stop I realized that I had only 100 rupee notes and no small change. wuu, whoz gonna argue with the conductor for a 5 re ticket. And listen to gaalis early in the morning… so I thought why not. Let’s walk. I used to walk into office two years back. I stopped when the winter ended. Yes yes… I know it’s just a notional winter in mumbai. It’s never really cold. But atleast you can manage to get to office without having a sweaty wet stinky shirt. I normally walk faster than most but yesterday I decided to slow my pace down a bit. A fair bit actually. I tried noticing the people, structures and other paraphernalia around. It’s interesting to see how people, a majority of them walk and run to office with their eyes looking down. With the city pavements you are always avoiding a hole here, a sewage there, a dog etc. And not to mention plenty and plenty of feet. So every one is walking with eyes down. I don’t even think beside the conversationalists anyone even looks at the heritage buildings. We fret and fume and spend so much agony over whats happening to our heritage. But the guys who work there everyday don’t even care a dam. I think the simpeast way to make people concerned about the heritage is to make them notice it. and the opnly way to make them notice is to get their eyes off the floor. The only way to get their eyes off the floor is to ensure smooth and predictable pathways. This way they walk with their eyes up and see around them. This way more men and women notice each other. The more they like each other, the more hey fall in love, and pronto… World Peace. Ok ok ok…you can’t get rid of Saddam by better pavements… but you sure can ensure beautiful facades. I don’t mind Iraq war as long as I can get a prettier surrounding that I can look at. What say?
Also slowing down walking is almost a nirvanic exercise by itself. You actually need to control your walk steps, breathe a bit, and relax. The world just seems different if you are slower than your normal. Try another stress buster. In the mad rush, just simply follow all traffic rules a s a pedestrian. Cross only at zebra crossings; walk only on pavements, cross only when the green man smiles at you. It is actually a big self control not to walk ahead when the teeming mass behind you is inching forward with a nervous pregnant energy, conquering space and redefining the road available for the car. But resist this force, and feel the energy flowing through. Wait on the footpath and start your cross of the chasm only when the signal turns and you will realize one outstanding fact as you are triumphantly crossing. The pedestrian crossing signal does not give you enough time to cross the road. It is built to discount the fact that you are already half way across. And you suddenly realize you only half way there when the green man disappears and the red man motions you to stop. You swivel right, all the share taxis that run amuck in the morning are aiming for you and you bloody run like mad across the 30% that is left, trying you best to look down so that you don’t trip, look up so that you don’t hit the opposite guy crossing and then building up into an almost flying trapeze jump across the gutter that is always placed at the corner and landing in the arms of the lady who is busy talking on her cell while getting to office (eyes down of course). She gives you the loveliest ugly stare and mental swear you could get in the morning. aha ha… what a nice day….nirvanic exercise was never so touching.

run buddy run, then eat

They all run... they allways do..

Jaagte rahooooooo….. all the old independence era movies would show the ubiquitous watchman trying to do his duty with his nightly calls. I guess today there is a slight variation. It has to be bhaagte rahoooo…. Only for a mega metro like mumbai will a obscure number like 738 make a significant amount of impact, in fact this number is not prayed to will ensure a late entry to office, a missed movie starting climax, a late date, and a possible firing. Many have their own numbers which they live by 642, 827, 956. some of us even have made the code more complex by making it alpha numerical, such as 926 BO, 745 C or 648 P. hmmm. The plot thickens. Because many times the 743 CST is followed by the 1 SPL or is preceded by the 142 or of course the alpha numerical 6 LTD. So the entire sequence is 730 5 LTD 755 CST 1 SPL. A complex piece of action orchestrated with clock work precision.

For the dim witted or the plain sleepy towners who haven’t caught it yet the code (730 5 LTD 755 CST 1 SPL) is broken as:- leave home at 7.30 am to catch the 5 limited bus to get down at the train station to catch the 7.55 Chatrapati Shivaji Terminus local to catch the 1 Special that takes them to Nariman Point. As I said Bhaagte Rahooooooooooooooo.
This two decimal point precision is further fine tuned if you catch the bloody train at CST station. Since the trains start there they have installed huge digital clocks that even show the seconds, so as you enter the station you know that you have exactly 36 seconds left to catch you train, or exactly 48 seconds to run to your compartment and find a place to rest your butt (not park it – seating is not that easy with 48 seconds left). You also know that you have potentially 55 seconds left if you want a plastic vacuum packed bag of peanuts. How? Well 48 seconds for the train to leave and another 7 seconds the boy take borrow as he can jump while the train is just about to leave the platform. Ooohhh. We live the razor’s edge… cool nah! Now all that I want to see is the train timetable showing the train leaving at 6.46.38 am.

While on the peanuts I have always wondered on the way the vendors pack the peanuts that are sold at the station. The nuts are naked and packed in plastic packets that seem to have air sucked out of them. Since we assume that this is not a multi million rupee investment on the plant and that the Nehruvian dream of small scale sector is at full play the only option is….. the guy rubs the dry peanuts with his palm, blows the husk away with the air from his mouth. Then blows inside the plastic to open it, puts the nuts inside and then seals it with the heating element. Now how does he achieve the vacuum? Hmm, the only way is by sucking the air manually before sealing it completely. We are not even on the topic of does the bloody thing gets dry in the first place. Also while on the topic it is interesting to note that thanks to the advent of AIDS, we have a lot of cases of TB among the lower strata of society. This TB is getting worse and s getting increasingly resistant to treatment. So much for a blow by blow account! Pretty cool, nah, how the promise of a 2 rupee peanut snack is so beautifully played out. YA.. Anybody hungry for a snack?

Eat India from delhi to bombay

Trains… lovely thing they are. I always like them and I loved traveling by them. But I guess the demand on time are soo much that I rarely use them these days. Flights are it. flights are so impersonal compared to trains, so bad and ugly. There is some romance left in trains, though I don’t get to see many PYT’s in trains at all.
I went to Delhi in a flight but I came back in train. What a smart decision. The Rajdhani is an awesome experience. They keep feeding you through out the journey. Starting with water, snacks, soups (yes sir with butter and bread sticks) and dinner, with sweet dahi and ice cream. And next day breakfast. Move over cricket, its eating that’s India’s number one entertainer. I could just see all the guys in the trains getting surprised at the platter and entertained purely on the eating. The gastronomical delights score over voyeuristic or even patriotic delights. I am convinced India is born to eat. The clarion call of today’s age is Eat India! Notice how when you go on a date you normally go to eat, when you go with family you eat, when you go to the movie you eat, when you play cricket you eat, when someone dies you eat, when someone marries you eat, on corporate meetings offsites, anything we eat. All this talk about eating is making me feel hungry now. EAT EAT EAT EAT. It is not by sheer co incidence that the longest running TV show in India is, yes sir, Khana Khazana.
Hmmm coming back to the train journey… its nice not to have too much crowd to interact with. I finished a lovely book start to end. It was ‘the making of Sholay – by Anupama Chopra.’ I always liked her writing before. She writes well and the book was a delightful easy read with lots of interesting trivia thrown. A must read for Sholay fans. Aren’t we all… very nice. I read in one flat 4 hour session. I don’t think I have ever read a book start to end without putting it down. This is the first one… I even was laughing in parts. I had to control or risk the train guys thinking me to be mad. Good fun. I suddenly rediscovered train journeys. Will have to somehow figure them in my vacations again. Forced long quality time with Jispa should be quite nice. Only thing is that I used to prefer non a/c, but given the bad hygiene in trains and family, I prefer the A/c. Its far more stress free. Non a/c can get to you at times I guess. I guess, life grows on you. I would want Jispa to back pack on non a/c but I guess it’s ok either ways. The principle being that don’t complain on the heat, dust, pollution, dirt etc. I have been thru much more in my life and I would want her to go thru a lot of it as well. But who knows when she grows up what will happen. I definitely don’t prefer a soft pink chick. But then that’s a dad’s point of view today. When she grows up I might just as well give her money to fly all over. Funny thing this parenting is. Kuch long term plan hi nahin karneka… full ulta ho jayega.

marry more, whack more

Been away for a couple of days and already got mail on why is the blog not being updated. Accha boost hai to my blog… thank you. Keep pushing, dear friends, I really love you guys.
Haan, toh I had been to Delhi to attend a friends wedding. It was a nice good punju wedding held on the open lawns. But man was it cold. Luckily I reached at 3 pm; and I was feeling really cold. It just scared me enough to buy one wool sweater as reinforcement for the evening. Yet I was freezing … next to the fireplace! The fireplace sittings can get interesting as your front feels nice and warm and your butt is frozen solid. So then you turn around and get what you always wanted in life – a really hot ass. And punju weddings get over at 2.45 in the morning. So it’s nice to enjoy the cold. The only thing that got me warm was when we wanted to wring the bloody shoes off the dhula. Let me tell you the entire story. The dhula’s shoes are always on great demand so he exchanged them with his best man. so after the ceremony the ladies wanted to get hold of them. So I simply suggested that they lanch a physical attack. So I got the guy, put him on the floor and well…. attacked. In the mayhem some other best men came to rescue which were effectively warded off by the women tickling. More best men came. In the free for all, the women started attacking me as I was attacking the shoes that they were also attacking, with them thinking that I was protecting what I was actually attacking… whew… so they were tickling me like crazy, but one slight problem… I don’t get tickled. So all I got was very very aggressive pokes. So after clearing the confusion I went about the task of getting the bloody shoes off… wow... wedding scan be fun. A good place to release all the frustration of traveling in crowded trains and office work. Just go to a few weddings and then whack the shit out of people either getting the shoes or protecting them. WOWIE>>> weddings are fun. No wonder I advise all my friends to get married fast. In fact if I enjoy this too much I will ask to get married more often!!!
And also I have no clue why they deck the bride so much. She looks lovely without the entire getup, then why the hell do they mess around, sooooo much. Well she still managed to look pretty inspite of it all and definitely not because it. So when she asked me how she looked. I gave her – you look pretty. But then that was the truth. The whole truth was – you look pretty, but you look prettier without the getup… but it was nice to see her get married. Always a cute thing to see girlfriends getting married.
And I rediscovered the joys of train travel…. More on that to follow...

Jintan and love for the morning

I found Jintan. Any one familiar with the pill? While shifting houses, akin to the ocean churn, one of the things thrown up was a sealed Jintan pack I had bought god knows when. It was good fun. Jintan was my dada’s favorite pocket mouth freshner. It was his standard remedy for me. I was never a great morning starter when I was a kid. I used to get morning sickness. Simply put early morning start on vacations in a car used to bring out the breakfast in me. So in go two Jintan’s in the hope of retaining breakfast (futile) and then in go two Jintan’s to feel better once the breakfast (usually milk) is bubbled out. So the taste of Jintan does remind me of the fond memories of travel with family. Feel funny in the morning, the memory of sticking your head outside the car and feeling the crisp morning air, keeping mouth open to dry, and the typical smell of Indian dhul – mitti. I like that. Its funny how despite being such a bad morning kid I still love and have lovely memories of the morning. I guess it’s because unlike my bro/sis who were busy sleeping and me busy puking. So in hindsight I guess puking was better to sleeping blissfully unaware of mornings, unaware of sunrise, unaware or nip, unaware of haze, unaware of beauty. I have remained a morning person since. I love sunrise, I love leaving before dawn and driving out to catch the sunrise. I guess in hindsight its no wonder I wake up early and am in office by 8.30. One hour before the din arrives. Also with the new house with lots of open spaces around I get to catch the sunrise while driving out (winter I guess). It’s lovely. I love it.
As my father in law like to say - "warning, dont miss the morning".

here is the view every morning as we drive westward.

compassion

While we get to see a lot of pretense we rarely get to see any amount of genuine compassion. We will see a lot of passion or I would like to call it misplaced aggression, but compassion is in short supply. I am always moved by acts of compassion but to incorporate genuine compassion is so difficult. It’s sometimes so funny to see a lot of people get so moved by dead cows, dead kitten and dead dogs etc on the road but would have no qualms eating it…. hahaha its so bloody funny. Compassion my ass….
No, don’t get me wrong here. I am nowhere near compassion as I would like to be. Or would dream to be. I guess many times I like the laws of nature to take their own course. I try not to interfere with it. Let not compassion interfere in what nature has held out. But ya, I try and help if I can. But to actually understand what compassion means is to meet two of the finest individuals god has produced. One – Prem Sundar Narayan, two Rajesh Shadevan. It is thanks to sheer luck that I have come in contact with these gentlemen. These two by sheer force of their nature have changed me in more ways than one. Their ability to touch, heal, change the very people they meet. Their ability to ---I don’t know how to put this ---- subjugate themselves and yet retain themselves is outstanding. Their greatness in their ability to rise without meaning to, or even wanting to. It is by no mean a co incidence that they the best – the very best – brand strategists I know of. For, to understand the brand one has to understand the consumer, and to understand the consumer it is important to have genuine compassion for him and genuine empathy. Only if you are able to feel genuinely will you make a great brand promise and great brand delivery. Which bloody B school / prof will explain compassion as a prerequisite for strategy? Only compassion will let you see beyond your own mind shit and your own preconceived notions of what the consumer wants, needs or feels. So much time is spent by kids trying to figure out brand strategy with a lot of shit and shat thrown in, but people doesn’t realize to be a great brand strategist one needs to be an outstanding human being. Care must be your core virtue for it to translate outward. CARE CONCERN AND COMPASSION. It’s no wonder we find worms and acid in things we eat. It no wonder people are increasingly fickle and disloyal about brand choice. We won’t dare change a doctor / nurse / teacher who is caring, then why would we change a cosmetic, soap, a gel, a food, a drink. We need more Gandhi’s in marketing, and we need more of them in strategy. Sometimes selfish goals can only be achieved by true selflessness. Opposites do reconcile.

hero again

I have written about the hero’s journey before…. I find it so fascinating. I see kids growing up, I see my office colleagues growing up, I see my kid growing up and I see myself growing up. They were just a blur of growth till I understood (in a little way) the journey of the hero. Instead of a blur it seems to be a series of steps leading up the path. Each step small or big shapes up and moulds us. Many of these steps are in the form of success and failures and many more are just break outs of independence or dependence (marrying for one). I have learnt to love to watch these steps in my life. It seems so lovely to see these steps leading to somewhere. The milestones getting planted in the psyche of journey. If viewed as such they seem so much fun. They give to me at least a lovely philosophical angle that makes me smile, that makes me resilient, that makes me believe in myself as a hero. The hero of the journey that I have to complete. It is so like the fantastical tale where the hero overcomes many odds to win the princess. Which reminds me of the story I once wrote for the college magazine. The story was a very simple fantasy tale with witches and dungeons thrown in. nothing separated the story form the Hans Christian Anderson tales Except for the ending. Here the hero in his last swish of the sword is about to slay the evil witch and chooses to forgive. I forget what really happens but in his act of forgiveness he resurrects someone something….. the editor of the magazine in all his wisdom edits the story and kills the witch and publishes it. What a cracko… I still feel so shitty about this. Why do we impose our own ideas and paradigms on the world. Why the fuck do we not let people be. We should just let people explore and form their own paradigms. Recast your own rules. Change is about making it happen. If it requires you to graft in and dig hard… so be it. But make it happen. Take your time, graft harder but make it happen. Bhen kiii… after all it’s your journey and your choice. Aaagggghhhhhhh…. What the hell… if you choose not to change the world, and flow with tide…. That’s also ok re… sab chalta hai life mein… itna bhi complex nahin na hai. Just get a rule that simplifies the entire life as you see it. the journey story works well for me. It simplifies the entire growing up and taking shit and happiness bit. That’s a large part of my life. Ma ki aa… itna variables hai ki at least the rule must be simple to see all in one lens.

poetry blogs, photo blogs

I was reading some random blogs today and caught my friend blogging. Quite a nice blog. I have linked her here without her permission. (I am not sure she will mind or not. But heck, it’s nice and on public domain) She clicks great pix too... hmmm, I always knew she was immensely talented, but somewhere I felt she is not using her strengths enough. Too much thinking can many ways be a bad thing. But hell, that’s not what I wanted to do. some blogs are lovely. I like the way she wrote. A lot of talking to her self almost great poetry. Similar to what quite a few blogs write. Some how I realize while I love that writing, I don’t quite write like that. I dunno! what is my style? I think it’s much like talking to other people than my self? Or is it talking to myself ‘my style’. One will only have to see.
I click a large number of photos, thanks to digital cameras; but for some reasons I only upload the ones I click on my phone – why do I do that? I dunno! But putting up some snaps might be interesting, I guess. They are not too bad as well.
The recent offsite at Shimla I clicked quite a few snaps and almost none of Shimla. I am quite bored of clicking scenery. I life people snaps, emotion snaps and ‘that moment’ snaps. Why? I dunno!
Lets see, let me upload a few. Also the big thing for me is that since a lot of my snaps are of people, I fell almost breach of privacy to upload them. Since I also click when they are not noticing – thanks to 12X optical zoom, I make it a point to first show them the snaps. Some real lovely snaps are therefore quite private. Hmmmmm. What to do? I dunno! I guess I will just start a new blog exclusive to photos.



Well at least there is one snap that I can show you guys. Jispa’s amazing drawing and imagination skills. Do try and guess what she has drawn -------------------------------------------------

it’s actually a snail with a cake on top with a cherry on top of the cake. You figure where is what. Also while we understand the cherry on the cake its up to you to figure out why is the snail carrying the cake. GO ASK HER!

Discovery.....

When you read books you never know what you are going to get. Even the worst book will give you understanding on bad books. Whenever I read a book I try and look for only one thing, that one nice big thing that will remain with me for a long time to come. Many a times it is something tangential to the core area of what the book wants to explore or propagate. I just finished reading the ‘Call of the Mall’ by Paco. His earlier book ‘why we buy’ was an outstanding book and I found this quite a let down by his standards but a great read nevertheless. This is a great compliment for the guy’s insightful thinking. But the one line that struck me the most is almost the last line in the book - Discovery is one of our most satisfying emotions. A fantastic insight. It is by no means a coincidence that we love lectures where the prof takes us on a journey of discovery. He knows what the results will be but the journey of us discovering is so fascinating. I too try and get tehkids to discover by themselves a lot of things. The only thing they need is a direction. Among the bets projects that I have received from the kids is when I give them a blank mandate, to research anything they want, start talking to a hundred people, discover seemingly unrelated insights and then focus on something they think is brilliant or astounding. These are normally the projects that get them most excited and they remember it for years to some. They love it and the learn so much because they have discovered insights themselves!!!!!
We also feel great joy in discovering a bargain, a great shirt, a lovely book, a nice place to eat etc …. The journey results in the exhilaration of discovery.
It also applies to office. We love bosses that let us experiment and let us discover by ourselves. It is called freedom at workplace. Hmmm… I have been doing a bit but also have been guilty of not doing it enough. Lets see. I have tried a lot to stay away but tightened noose when the run away has been far. How do I get to manage this? How would opposites reconcile here. Difficult but possible.
Same for parenting. Lets see if I can get Jispa to Discover a lot on her own…. Will only have to show her possibilities / directions. Will have to let her discover limitless joys / emotions / lands / games / stories and much more on her own…. After all DISCOVERY IS ONE OF OUR MOST SATISFYING EMOTIONS. What a commonsense insight. Always the most brilliant of insights seem like common sense in hindsight.

college days are meant for ...

If I were younger this is the time to be…. Man when I was in college women wore mainly salwar’s to college. But these days you can’t see anything but denims. I know so many guys who used to wear formals to college. I used to be among the few wearing denims every day. The colleges these days are a rockingly colorful place to be. Luckily being in a relatively heppier town college and I was not as starved as many others in different colleges and in different cities. Fashion shows were a norm and they were all over the place. So skin was never an issue. But I guess the sheer multitude of fashion hitting you in the face is interesting to say the least. Hmmmm…. I sound like an old fart but the way I see the colleges moving it seems like an anthropologist’s wild fantasies come true. The length of the skirt would have inverse relation with the balance of payments reserve of our nation. I mean in my time as a nation we had barely enough money to pay for our next month’s import and we had to pledge our gold!
It is also interesting and amazing that we somehow went through college without … horror of horrors …. INTERNET. I mean how did we do that. In fact I even passed B school without the essential Cut Copy Paste, without internet; doing projects by referring to the library. How menial is that? And yes, we did not have cell phones as well. Wow…. It’s a wonder we ever managed to coordinate and go anywhere. And I also remember paying 8 bucks for a rear stall ticket at sterling cinema…. Also I just remembered… I paid a grand for a custom built calf length cowboy boots! I have no clue how I did that. I actually used to wear them as high fashion. They used to zip up and heat up like hell. They were also heavy and with leather soles they were slippery as well. They also had some chain around the heel. Aaagh the sins of youth!!!!

Beaten by the loop, saved by the cream

Sunday was my morning at home all alone. I had the option to either play cricket or do some odd jobs at home. So I figured, let me do a quick job and then I will figure what to do. The errand at hand was tying the nylon ropes for the clothes to dry outside. Hmmmmm. Should be a five minute thing. So I decide to start trying the ropes and hmmmmmm. The rope was freshly bought and looped in a special manner. I had no clue that one has to be very careful while unraveling it, else……yes... they get into a mess very fast. So I spent the next hour trying to unknot the ropes. ONE FREAKING HOUR. And it was a trying experience. After opening a large part of it I realized that the open part needs to be kept properly else that too was getting tied up. So after untying the ‘untied’ part on a ‘belan’ like kite manjha I start working on the other end. Figuring that the other end will meet this one to complete the process. So I put that in a loop and used my watch to secure it and then and then and then….. I gave up. I just took the knife and cut the rope! I gave in and admitted defeat to a humble loop! What a humbling experience. Then I tied the clothes line. Believe me, keeping it tight and tying a 12 feet X 4 line in a space you cant stand properly (4 feet high) was quite a bit. I had no energy to anywhere after that. So that was an hour and a half to do a 15 minute job. Good thing we had chocolate almond fudge ice cream at home. Worth every worth the effort! What say Jasmine?

The attached photo is of me shivering in the Shatabdi form Haridwar to Delhi. The trains are bloody hot or bloody freezing!

school blues

Today was parents teachers meeting at Jispa’s school. I get dam bored at all these interactions. Not that I am disinterested in her school progress, but hell she is only 4 years old. The teacher has nothing significant to add. It’s all like Jispa is sweet. She now has started talking in class and other such simple silly inconsequential stuff. I want to ask more but then I don’t get too much feedback in return. Either the teacher is not so smart or that’s all you can talk about a four year old. In any case these teachers have no real insight nor can they discuss parenting. So its one of the ya ya.. ok ok .. hmmm… kind of conversations. What a bore man. But I guess it’s important to go as a habit. You get to see the school, teachers etc for whatever its worth. I guess its important just to be in touch. The teachers know, your kid knows that you take interest in the school, and shows importance you attach to education. Besides that not much for now to get from bacha’s school.

Below is the chopstick we stuck through poor golum's chest on our office white board. so much office boredom.

the hero's journey

Shifting into a new house is quite a journey. Especially when it’s your first home that you have made all by yourself. A very interesting thing happened. Jispa for the first time was to sleep all by herself in a separate room. I thought it’s a big thing for her since she’s only around four and a half. She seemed quite enthused. I gave a long set of instructions, where is the bathroom, where we kept her water, where to find us (one room away!), which light will remain on, and all. I think it was a small step in her hero’s journey. She also had her very own terracotta army (see picture of her ten Ganesha’s) to help her along the journey. But I realized something very important. The step was as much her step on her journey as it was mine on my journey. It was a step towards me letting her on her own. A cutting of a symbolic fraternal umbilical cord of sorts. And the cord was mine to let go, not hers! I slept bad, constantly thinking about how she would cope. I checked a few times if she was likely to fall off. I think she too was a bit taken in by her first brush. She woke me thrice – one for water getting over, one for getting hungry (luckily there was an apple) and once for mosquito biting. She normally does not wake up like this. At night (or early morning, I don’t know) while I was feeding her the apple she told me that she went to pee by herself as well and the subtle idea being that she did not wake me up for that. Hmmmmm, as Joseph Campbell said you have to lose your one state (die) and resurrect into another to complete one leg of the hero’s journey. Today, I think she died an infant and has been resurrected a child. I died one stage of fatherhood and have been resurrected another. The journey continues…

Mind Memory

Of all the things I want to lose the last thing I want to lose is my mind. And the only thing I won’t realize losing when I lost it is… my mind. OPPOSITES RULE!! Mind is such a powerful object. It can run you or ruin you (sorry for the bad figure of speech). It’s also very difficult to control. I have tried my entire life to control and harness the power of the mind. But to very obvious noting, they have turned to near naught. A few leanings though…..Over a period of time the mind learns to deal with a vast majority of problems only if you have conditioned it to learn and keep learning. I feel that there always connections in the brain that keep happening and reinforcing. These connections over a period of time give you conviction and character. Personally it has been fascinating to note how the mind evolves as an object that merely responded, to an object that has learned to respond. More like muscle memory in sport. There is something I believe in ‘mind memory’. If given sufficient scenarios played in your mind then most likely, the mind will be well equipped to handle it when the need arises. It also what some people call being paranoid. A state of readiness and effective call to action will be achieved only if one borders on paranoia. This is basically to envisage a range of possibilities that can arise given a situation and then condition the mind to be prepared for the next steps once it happens. This is also simply called margin of safety. One has to envisage the range of probable options, visualize solutions / course of actions and then let go. If you constantly think about it then you are only creating a paranoid state. This state is only required in war. And if you are on war front constantly then it can only add to your stress. So I try (also recommend) the old scout motto – be prepared. That’s all there is to it.
So next time the teacher / boss catches you day dreaming tell her that you were mind memory’ing. So that’s should be a valid excuse to get you out. But you would also need to mind memorize what to do if you get caught in the first place. What shit.

jispa's ganesha's

Quantity versus quality. What to do? What is the trade off? I have settled into a routine that makes me write every day I am in office and bunk writing all other days. Obviously I cant think of something profound every single day. Some may even argue that I cant think of ‘anything’ profound, any day!!! Whatever, but assumedly writing only when I think of some ‘eureka’ thing then I am likely to just not write at all. I mean how times does one get the chance to run out of the bath tub stark naked shouting Eureka eureka. Archimedes was ugly but at least he had something universal to say. So dear readers – do subject yourself to my TP and hope that some days I will write better than others. The other thing is that I am likely to write shorter than longer. If it is boring – gawd – atleast it ends fast! So everyday the routine is that from masjid to VT station I will start to think about what to write. On a good day I get two three topics and on a bad day – none. So I just keep writing, backspacing, and rewriting! But the fact that there are some of you who read makes me keep going on and on.
Yesterday I just finished the shifting and settling of my new home. I am happy with the shape it took. It was almost as close to the original visualization. Dam cool. Nice warm and completely livable. I had gifted Jasmine a set of 10 Ganapatis years back. Tiny terracotta ones. I arranged them in a row. They overlook Jispa’s bed. I was telling her that she will have 10 Ganesha’s protecting her while she sleeps. (we hope to see her sleep alone byherself) She kinda likes the concept. So lets see. That set about a conversation by her asking – REAL GODS? And I said something abstract like - No only statues but the god is real and he will protect. And we got into some highly philosophical discussion on real god versus statues and the fact that we cannot see god so we have statues etc etc. funny learning coming form an agnostic. But I am amazed by her ability to simplify and comprehend abstract, philosophical discussions and distill it in her own way. Interesting. That’s why I never try and get to dumb with her on explanations. I like to keep it as close to my understanding but with simpler text.
will try to get the photos of her gods and publish them here...

service any one???

I love these PSU’s . the way these government organizations will have customer weeks. So if you are a customer you are only requested to come alive during the week and the rest of the year you may die waiting in the queue’s with cobwebs around your ears. Its been a few hundered years since I last went to these banks and saw the aunties (not) process the work. Man they used to treat you like shit and the customer is like an interruption in their serious conversation about, about,… god knows what. But human nature will not change. The new kids on the block are the spanking new designer clad super hyper active banks. I like to call them the ‘big box’ banking. With the obvious mantra of customer king and more such mantra’s they rae here to take your money mange it and return a profit (not to you, their share holders – idiot). One such bank (promoted by a housing finance company), suddenly decided to send me a letter. You are no longer receiving a salary in this account therefore this is not a zero balance account. Chalo theek hai. Will maintain minimum balance. Next letter 10 months hence. You are not receiving a salary in this account so we are closing this account in 30 days. RESPOND OR DIE! Abe chutia, have you seen my minimum balance? Its 50K. Why would you want to close the account unilaterally, especially when this is a profitable account. So I go to the branch and they say sorry, this account will close becoz some one in product management took this decision and so basically SCREW YOU. I am requested to open a new account with new account numbers and my existing auto debit credits can jump in the well. So I take their case, drop a few names and request to see the branch manager. The poor soul decided to hear my case and make a ‘rare’ exception in my case. Main bach gaya maa! Main bach gaya… Its not about customer week, its about customer orientation!! Another big box bank with the logo ‘i’ gave my wife big time pain on some real piddly issue of transferring money. Same ruse worked. Coolly screwed the agent by taking his name down on a book, asked for his reporting hierarchy, said I work in a bank, dropped a few names in his senior management and walked off. Surely --- his call came apologizing! Hmmm, work gets done only if you do your research well and know some interesting names. Not the big boss name that come in the press but one or two down the line.




Coming to the second photo. Our dear BMC was paving the pavement at VT station with noble intentions (random question: if the pavement is not yet paved, then can it be called a PAVEment? Therefore can I run the car on it?) So somebody dumped the entire sand pot on the place where the bus line works. So pray tell us how would the line flow?






The third is a lovely photo of the HOLY COW wanting to bless our train with its HOLY URINE. OH sooooo holy. We are truly blessed. Location? I don’t remember… probably somewhere in the ‘cow belt’

She’s got the look.....

I find it highly amusing to see the look on the everyone’s face. Its the typicall look that one can associate with that individual. Like I see one guy in the office building everyday. The bugga will have a perpetual scowl. Or that prof from college, who always had the look that he is going to come down and box you. In fact his scowl was so prominent that whenever something made him smile the whole class would go into raptures. I guess my college mates and guys from commerce would figure whom I am talking about. It so much fun seeing the looks. Some guys will have that perpetual confused look ( a big friend of mine). Some profs will always have the nice sweet look, some will have that sweet look along with the ‘I am trying to get tough so that you don’t mess with me look’. That poor prof will always get messed with in any case. Some profs will always have the harassed look. I loved the Shivi look – he was always with the BIG Obliexesque smile with that burly mouchie. It rocked man!!! And that would turn into a worried frown when he wanted it to. I always felt that unlike others he could control it and produce his look at will. That’s a prince!!! The other look I loved was Mrs Hasina. Top class!! Always genuine. That look that said I am genuine, and I am genuinely interested in teaching and I am genuinely interested in caring about you. Mrs Dias had that look that said I am nice but don’t get smart with me mister! Some students of mine always have that “Siirrrrrrrr” look. Like they are always dying to meet you and some have that I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooo boooored look. Most of the students staying in south Bombay will that I am soo bored and I couldn’t care less look. Man its so much fun to rag them. Some students will have the DUHHH look! I am soo DUHHH that I get confused which hand to eat with, look. Some just have that, I want to be seated look. Some have that I am dying to have a crush on someone look. This applies to men and women. Some will have that I am toooo smart for this class look.
Hmmmmm. Talking about teachers and crushes makes me remember my crush on my teachers. Man how many did we have…. In school I remember one Clare Alvaro. I read later in an interview that even Akshay Kumar had a crush on her (yup same school different generations). Then there was a French teacher (yup couldn’t any better figuratively) Ms Anna. She was very sweet to me. Then the college profs – the usual ones every one loved – Mrs Saxena, Mrs Dias, Mrs Haseena, Mrs Kalhan….. we had guys just attending Mrs Hasina’s class purely for her. Man I guess it must be quite nice to be “THE” prof in a college. We used to admire Mrs Ballaporia too, she used to carry herself very well. Hmmm.. some of these profs I still meet in college when I go to teach. I hope they don’t kill me after reading this!!! I still love them!!!!
I really don’t know why I loved college, but I sooo miss it. Teaching there make me feel that I have gone back. That’s why I just feel funny wearing formals to college and when I go to teach I dress like I would if were attending it my self. I can’t even sit in the staff room like a prof… so unlike me….My mental frame is similar. And the poor canteen waiters whom I did not tip in college for lack of cash get some obscene tips from me now. The Jaihind redemption. And with kids I always pay as I remember not having adequate pocket money then. But these days they get some huge amounts, but who is paying for them… I am paying for all, for me… on that philosophical note… tatatatatatatatata.

oh please can you 'please'?

For all these years one was told that money does not make people happy, money cannot please, money is not the route to happiness etc etc. I was not sure so I went on the quest my self! After 9 years of slogging my butt out I have reached some respectable balance in the bank and net worth. And now I come to the conclusion that hmmmmm money does make people happy but its up to us to digest it. like all food, if you walk a bit after eating, eat only what you want and take time to digest it, then it will probably make you feel nice. Else you risk bad gas. This is analogous to money. Money typically has no problem. The problem lies in its pursuit and use. But that’s a 31 year old talking lets see a 41 year old me speak on the same. How much saner can I get?

And yes, after days of suffering my beard my wife was pleasantly surprised. I shaved it off. Poor thing was wondering why. Actually its not too much to write home about. Basically I went to get it trimmed and the dickhead barber did a real horrid job of it. He trimmed it till I could almost see it no more. I in fact asked him to pay me! What an ass, but I am sure my wife would want to thank him. My daughter was surprised to see the shaved look as well. Her first reaction ‘you look like someone else’. Hahaha she now finds the cheeks rough and wants me to get my beard back! So mommy was explain why it’s smooth and daughter was explaining why it’s rough. Some gospel once said – women are tough to please!

Yesterday I felt like the god. We are doing a CD Rom about investing and my team is heading the project. I had hazaar vies on the navigation, layout, topics, and wanted to put in extras like – related links, related topics, further readings etc. then we decided to buy the Encarta to get some inspiration (anu malik style). And Voila --- they also have the same structure with related links, related articles and stuff exactly like how I had visualized it! Some one with common sense and decent exposure can almost match up to bigger experts. This is an important effect of reading. Its gives you exposure to world class facts, opinions, practices, norms, procdedures and learnings. I attribute it all to reading a wide range of topics and selections. Read read read read read read read read read read …

leadership durc

One of the nice things that happened at the offsite that I got to learn / relearn some of the leadership principles. We were divided into 4 groups for a treasure hunt around a 4 km hike. Decently tuff hike for amateurs. I managed to weasel my way into a team that I believed had decent guys. These guys were not necessarily the fittest, but they were definitely more fun types and not so much pain types. The philosophy is simple – people do not need to be motivated, they just need to be shielded from demotivation. The team had the basic skills and fitness. So all they needed was someone NOT to push them too hard. On their own pace they reached the finish line – not only the first but also the fastest that the resort had ever seen. 1 hour 30 minutes as opposed to the previous record of 1 hour 42 minutes. I was appointed the leader at the start. I tried not to ‘lead’ too much. Just ensured the right guys were doing what they wanted to do. But more importantly I was just spending time with the last person on the group. Knowing the typical treasure hunts that resorts have, I knew that the clues won’t be too much rocket science. So the pay off will be on the whole group finishing about the hike about the same time. So I let the group move ahead and only pushed the last person by singing and pace setting. I was sure the catch up would be simpler in the down slopes at the latter part of the race. We won by a handsome margin. But also importantly I refused to push anyone too hard. It’s after all just a simple race. If people know their job, have the basic skills and have a desire to win then that’s all that’s required. Don’t push …. Just try and remove any demotivation and be with the guys slower than the group. Mind you the slower guy might be faster than the rest of the teams. And VOILA… good team. A lot of good individuals by themselves, left to themselves will present outstanding results. The aggregate has to be good, not individual brilliance. There might be a whole host of lucky breaks (black swan problem) to help us. But still, some principles improve what luck gives… After all opportunities are every where – its up to your understanding to capture them and max them.

Also another thing I love is taking lots of photographs. I don’t like taking tooo much scenery, I prefer portraits and the various moods that can be captured. Lots of guys love the photographs. But you know what irks me more – after seeing the snaps they ask me which camera I have… and they praise the camera. Oh bloody hell… just by taking Tendulkars bat you can’t hit Warne for a six. Mine is a nice camera, agreed, but it’s not the most expensive one. I love it when people love the photos. I love taking their snaps and then gifting it to them. People are so beautiful when they are normal.. and that’s the time to take their pics. Else they must be put in odd poses that they enjoy for best effects…

Sturgeon's Law meets Mallika - woooooooooo

Sturgeon's law - 90% of everything is Crud. Good for us. Otherwise imagine shifting thru 100% of data that the world throws at you. Unlike the famous Ogilvy quote about 50% of advertising is wasted; the problem is in knowing which half…. Most Crud is easily distinguishable. What is not may retain and will help over the life time. So say hurrah for the Crud else we would be living with football size brains that have mutated over time to retain the 90%. And if Mallika’s brains were in her unmentionable parts as most agree (this might be potentially read by my daughter) then wowie for the despo bihari bhaiyas that have migrated overseas. But what if we are currently filtering out 90% crud, then does that prove that her unmentionables are actually 90% bigger. AAAGGGGHHHHH. What is this that I am writing? My core audience for reading this blog might be 50% skewed in favour of the fairer ones and this will potentially put them off. Or will it. I am sure they hate Mallika in any case and would love to (not on the face of it) disown her. Jispa when you are older and if you are reading this, please do not judge your father to be a cheap one track bastard. I am actually completely screwed by a three night four day offsite that that had one night in the train and two days traveling. And of course Sturgeon’s Law was at work there as well. Or was it Sturgeon’s Corporate Law – 99% of everything in corporate in crud :) (corporate life is really funny. never a dull moment. i would hate to give it up) What always amazes is that for all that Crud, a lot of us are surprisingly making a lot of money (opposites reconciling). But from that to assume that one needs 99% Crud to survive in corporate is similar to the Black Swan problem. "No amount of observations of white swans can allow the inference that all swans are white, but the observation of a single black swan is sufficient to refute that conclusion." So what to do? The trick is in not getting to frustrated and allowing crud to settle at manageable levels. Each one will get to a level where they are comfortable with not only the crud that is thrown at them but also will get to an acceptable level of crud they themselves throw. One man’s crud could be another man’s durc. Durc is opposite of crud. Forgive the bad joke – its 7.49 pm and I have had my share of crud thrown at me but not enough thrown back. So helpless reader – stay on. Also a perfect example of CRUD – DURC is this link on Falsifiability I encountered while researching the black Swan problem. Outstanding as it may be… I made no sense of it! In spite of knowing the bloody theory!

And guess what some kids (more than one is some) have been inspired by me to start their own blogs… yahooooooo…. I am piece of shit so you be that tooooo…. No offence meant. Good job kids keep going.