Recoil Reconcile?

I read on the bus today. The following seat bench is reserved for ‘the old, the physically handicapped and women’. I don’t know women can tolerate this. When they come into office they expect to be treated on par, to be paid equally and to grow equally. I hope to understand the feminist movement, but to then see good strong able women sitting down and classified along with the old and the infirm I wonder. Why would self respecting women accept this? Good educated women must protest, must not seat themselves here and must not expect special favours. Crush hour trains having special compartments, dedicated women trains is probably good, but to classified thus is blow to the feminist movement as I see it.

A small note on Clavin and Hobbes for Jispa when she grows up - Calvin is named for a sixteenth-century theologian John Calvin who believed in predestination; while Hobbes is named after Thomas Hobbes, a seventeenth-century philosopher with a dim view of human nature. Research it up. Its good fun. Do they fit or are they the opposite or it just doesn’t matter and is one of Bill Watterson’s pranks on you.

One of the reasons Jispa loves it is the faces Calvin makes. We should train her thus:-

train tickets, anyone?

Yesterday there were scores of ticket checkers at VT station in the morning and then again in the evening. As I was standing on the platform waiting for the train I could see a large number of guys being hauled into TC’s cabin on the first platform. Chatting up with one of the TC’s I learnt quite a bit. Here are some insights into a TC’s life.
They have targets per month of collecting fines. They have to collect at least Rs. 50,000 per month as fines. That translates to at least 8 people a day. Hmmm. Interesting. The concept of a target is definitely good but it also shows the confidence of the railway authorities in the honesty of the Indian Public. They obviously believe that a TC would definitely get that amount. This leads a ticket checker to get all sorts of people. He says that there are guys who make honest mistakes and enter through the ticket holders gate and then proceed towards buying the ticket. That is also a finable offense and people get caught. He also realizes that this is probably wrong but, what to do. Rules are rules and they apply equally.
He said that this is a drive that could be on for a couple of days. Drives like these help in increasing ticket sales. The mere presence of a man in uniform will drive the person to the ticket counter. According to him the best deterrence is a couple of TC’s in uniform at the dates. That’s enough. Also when there are so many TC’s together the fine is generally paid faster. Otherwise the argument / pleading of the traveler go on and on.
Another thing was that they get more people traveling ticketless in mornings and evenings than in the middle of the day. His reason was that people are in a hurry and tend to skip the long lines at the ticket counter during rush hour and take a risk. Interesting one that. It means that the people are generally not dishonest but there is a barrier to honesty in the system. Man is honest to a point. Beyond which he is tempted to cross. The risk existed before he saw the long line at the ticket counter itself, yet he went towards it, saw it, saw his watch and then decided to take the plunge. The solution is not more TC’s but more ticket counter open at peak hours. Is a ticket checker more of value checking tickets at rush hour is he of more of value manning one more ticket counter. I think an idea on dispensing tickets faster might have greater ROI than more ticket checkers. What say?
Here is another interesting tidbit. When they catch people traveling without tickets they take them to the cabin for the fine collecting and other formalities. To ensure that these guys don’t give the slip, the TC puts his hand on the shoulder and escorts him there. This any Mumbai train traveler will tell you are a common sight. The TC was saying that such an act is very insulting for the traveler. He does not want to be seen being escorted by the TC such. What if his friends see him? He typically pleads with the TC to release the shoulder, promising that he will come along. The TC also has no option. “They run away all the time. I have to put the hand on the shoulder. That stops him. If he was so honest as to walk properly he should have been honest enough to buy the ticket in the first place. If he is dishonest with the ticket, why should I trust him not to run now?” Good counter point.
Indian railways take pride in saying that they somehow against the odds take millions of people from one corner to another against all the odds. Sure I love these engineers who quietly keep the trains running, efficiently. But one thing we miss is human design. How do we have deep understanding of the average traveler so that we make small changes and design stations so that travelers feel the clean neat well designed stations and behave well. The broken windows theory comes to mind. I think its there is some of my earlier blogs. You could look it up on Google as well. A little bit of common sense thinking a la Paco Underhill (brilliant book ‘why we buy’) might be a good idea.

read on

Jispa reads a lot and everything she can lay her hands on. Augurs well for the future but I am not day dreaming yet. Not just yet. Not having a TV is a big and important role in this. Jispa is most at home in any book shop or any book fair. As long she gets her books and a place to sit. Here is a case in point. She is at home at the strand book fair.
When we went to Bharatpur this time around, I got down at Baroda station and picked up a few books for her. She enjoyed them. I didn’t know how much she could read but I was pleasantly surprised. She is right now reading Calvin and Hobbs. I don’t believe it. She loves the looks on Calvin’s face and his antics I guess, but might not understand the subtle sub texts. But I take some false pride in knowing that Jispa will be amongst the few in her class to be reading Clavin (perhaps only) especially since Calvin’s writer made sure that there is no merchandising spin off’s and no TV cartoon shows. How will the other kids know of him? Also, me thinks that Calvin would not be the ideal role model for Jispa... right?

The recession is looming well and strongly over us and none of us are safe. While we do try to economize and be smart about what we spend, books have some how been spared the cut in my family. I am not buying books as I have too many as a backlog. I don’t like collecting books as show pieces, I like to read them. And if there is a backlog, no more new books. Also it works as an incentive to read faster, harder.

on the shoulders of giants

We had an event on Tuesday. I had the priviledge of being the top dog at the event. So in other words I got the stupid job of bring the MC. I know I can do it, but normally I am too bored to do it. This time I had no such luck and was given the job. It went off pretty well. Two speakers stood out. Nandan Nilekani and Anil Kumble. I guess I am always a sucker for people talking about their experience as opposed to bookish management theories.
While I was too much in awe of Nandan to really ask him too much; and he was also surrounded all the time, with too many senior people. What really impresses me is the fact that Nandan being a business leader still is an academic in his approach and so different from other corporates. Most corporates just love to fart and hide behind their power point presentations. Nandan is precise and clear in his thought process.
Anil Kumble was also a revelation. He was outstanding as well. I got my two fundas clarified from him. First one – What the hell is a flipper. That’s the ball that got him wickets by the bagful. He explained the same to me. The other question was more serious (or was it the other way around). I had heard of this theory through two different sources. John Buchanan – the Australian team coach had said – you dont need to motivate someone to play in the Australian team. The fact that you are in the team and playing for Australia is motivation enough. The other time I read it is when Jim Collins wrote in his seminal book (I forget which one) that you shouldn’t need to motivate employees. You need employees who are self motivated. The role of the leader is to remove demotivating factors. I had liked this and believed in it. Give the employees an honest, open, fun and fair atmosphere and you are on. I don’t like motivating people or people who sit and sulk all the time waiting for external motivation. Itna time kisse ke pass nahin hai. I posed this to Anil. His response was that people are different. Motivation is not so much a problem but what the routine could get boring after a point in time. He said that if he came in everyday and was expected to do the same thing, bowl over after over and practice the same way, then it could get boring even for the athlete. He said in the tenure of John Wright, John brought in a lot of changes in way they practiced and brought in innovation and change. – that’s an interesting thought and with a bit of introspection I found it to be true. Sure employees need to be self motivated but it’s the job of the manager to ensure that it’s not boring over a period of time. Good point. Thanks Anil. I appreciate the thought. On another note he was gracious enough to ask for feedback, which I emailed to him and then he was even more gracious enough to reply back, thanking and accepting it. I am super impressed. Celebs are too irritating normally. Here is a level headed guy. It’s no wonder he was perhaps India’s best bowler.

My anniversary was on Monday. It was our tenth anniversary. Just a day before the most important event of the year, I was a bit busy and preoccupied. But I did manage to do something before. I gifted my wife a Swiss knife with her name engraved on one of the blades. That was a perfect anniversary gift!

hey bhagwan

Its been a long time. We took a family vacation in the middle. Went to palitana, gir and bharatpur. Palitana is a Jain super temple. It sure is a nice place. You stay at the bottom of the hill and then climb up three odd thousand steps in the morning. Its quite cool in the winter and definitely climbable. The base is taleti and used to be quite a sweet place 20 years ago when I first went. Now it’s a painfully polluted place thanks to the rickshaw’s adulterating fuel with kerosene. It’s unwalkable and unbreathable. And you have every ass building a huge temple. Any one who’s been to palitana will tell you that the last thing it needs is another temple. But they sure are being built as ugly phalluses all over the pace. They are built to themselves and not to god. God happen to be an unwilling accomplice. Do I hear of schools / hospitals etc being built there? Not me. We keep building temples. The Dharamshala is built – very good, but what about the old ones that need maintenance?

We leave it all behind on top. Feel a vibe that very nice. Jispa went into the temple and saw Jasmine entering the temple without the customary three salutes. Jispa then tells me that mummy will get paap , no? hmmm. No kid. There isn’t anything like paap and puniya. Isn’t god your friend? Will he be mean to you just because you did not do something as inane like bowing down? Say hi. Be a nice person to all around, show care. That’s all there is to life. Screw these rituals.
Net result – a few days later she tells me that she doesn’t believe in God. One more conversation – why not? Who made all these trees, birds, lives etc. there is someone there doing something, making something. Some force, right? Hehehe. She was a bit confused. But atleast she got over the paap shit that was banging her head.
She is free to have her own beliefs, her own view, her own mind. As long as she has something in her head I am ok. The most important thing is to have a view that is open, informed and pluralistic. Baki sab bakwas.

Be counted...

On the 26th of November Mumbai was struck bu horrific terrorist attacks. Of course the ‘lucky’ ones with the news channels on were as affected as any those directly in the line of fire I guess.
There was a protest march organized at the Gateway on Wednesday last. I did not want to march so much as I wanted to see the milling crowd at the place. Jasmine, Sonal (office kid) and I went across at Gateway at 5.30 pm. It was to start at 6. We saw a bunch of sardars setting up a water stall. We decided to ask for if we could help. “of course, seva ke liye humesha welcome”. That was a smart decision. For the next 4 hours we were helping the gang set up the stall, unload the water cartons, set up the tea and rush into the crowd with tea and water. Jasmine has a particularly good knack at serving others. Only she could go right into the crowd, against the flow and serve tea to everyone. To get an idea on the crowd, the road was around 100 meters long and around 30 feet wide at best, and there were more than a lakh of them protesting and marching in around 3 hours. I have no clue how she did it. In the middle I spent a lot of time trying to get the crowd away from overrunning the stall.
I have a theory on why so many came to protest. To be a part of an emotional &social cause and to be counted all one had to do was walk. That was too easy. But people came. And they were deadly angry. Hope it carries till the elections. Then we see.
I did not take any photographs of the place as I was tired of photographers going all over the place trying to catch some action of the place. No sensitivity, only asses with digital SLR’s making a nuisance of themselves. No smiles no acknowledgements, just keep on clicking. Idiots who spend a lot getting the equipment but don’t know even what shutter speed is.
Also while I was serving I noticed that a lot of people understood and responded to jokes/ one liners that I kept giving while serving. The men earlier always understood and responded. The women used to just frown and go cold. This time a lot of women responded as well. They sure are getting more confident and sure of their abilities. This augurs well for the nation. I don’t think too many economists would take this into account. The women are now getting up and getting accounted for as viable productive resources for the economy. They will work, they will shoulder responsibility and least of all they will raise far more confident children. I see it happening everywhere.

Over the week end we went for a walk on the Shilonda trail at the borivili national park. Jispa sure enjoyed it. Her friend from school, Kiara with her momma had joined in as well. Nice place man. I am sure to go there a few more times. Here is the snapshot. The entire trial is like this.
We got Jispa a new larger cycle without trainer wheels. She is now a ‘cyclist’. cool nah. Somehow for Jasmine and me this felt like a landmark.

Check this roadside ice cream stall. Noting remarkable about the stall, but notice that this guy too now offers a variety, albeit small, number of toppings. Right hand front corner has a few jars and the bottle is partially hidden.
Typical winter mornings near Bhakti Park as we go off to the school bus stop. I love it.

Corporate bullshit

Yesterday we went from office to at the food court that’s recently opened out at Nariman Point. Touted as South Mumbai’s first food court (whatever), it was quite a cheerfull and colorful place. We went in early at 12 before the crowd comes in at 1. By the time we were through at 1 pm, there were so many office goers. Lots of guys in formals and ties forming a stark contrast to the place décor. In fact there were so many corporate junkies there that I instantly felt claustrophobic. I am not exaggerating but I really hated to see so many ties at the place. I guess my associations with these places are more fun and frolic and the more I see the formal types, the less comfortable I feel. I too was in formals there but thank god I don’t wear a tie everyday. Possibly these guys remind me of what I probably am as well as what I hate to be. Confused? Same here.

Speaking of corporatism, something really Dilbertian happened at office yesterday. The AC ducts are a perennial problem with offices. People next to them feeling frozen and those 1 cm off the zone, sweat it off. So the guys under the zone put newspapers and anything else to block off the vent, making the others feel even hotter. Every six months the guys come in and take out the packing only to be replaced a week later. There is one duct on the ceiling right next to where I sit. The last time I was in some funny mood so I stuck a picture of my boss there instead of a newspaper. See this:

So yesterday the housekeeping comes running to me “sir, we have to remove the packing in front of your AC duct”. I look at it and say “are you sure you want to remove it. It has JaideepSir’s (my boss) photo on it”. “sir, that’s why I came to you. I removed everyone else’s packing”. I tell him “dude, if you remove JaideepSir’s photo from there you are responsible for it. If he asks anything, I will give your name”. The house keeping runs away keeping it intact. He goes to the admin head. The lady comes here and sees the photo in complete disbelief. “You hung JaideepSir’s photo there?”. “ya, and I am not responsible if you remove it from there. Instead of praying to god, I pray to him everyday.” She too goes away without removing it. What shit? My sweet boss does not even care if his photo is hung there or would care less if it was removed. I can’t believe that this incident actually happened. Fact is stranger than fiction. In corporates you might require permission to do something but you require even bigger permission to change or remove something. hehhehehehehehe

Ageing gracefully

Well ok, I am getting old (er).
I went for a haircut on Sunday and told the guy to cut it short, real short. He gives me a cut that’s not so short and in the end he tells me that since my hair is thinning this is the right length. Any less and the scalp would show. Oh Ya. Sure. I couldn’t help smiling. All I could think of was the scalp of my dad and his brothers and all the male cousins on my dad’s side. All bald or in various stages of balding. I am getting there albeit a bit slower than the others I think.
The other proof of age I think is the number of times I am beginning to hurt my self. Over the weekend the first was when I was helping my friend shift houses. I whacked my jaw by carrying a huge picture frame of a God. I actually whacked myself while I was turning the frame in my hand from horizontal to vertical. I can’t believe it. Then on Sunday I walked into a huge bamboo pole which was horizontal at around 5 and half feet. Banged my head (around the ears) into it. To make matter worse, in my own kitchen while lifting my leg to put one leg on the stool (just like that) I banged my knee into the handle for the drawer. Euu. That hurt.
I am talking about pride more than the mere physical torture.

Fulfillment

OK. Just for the record Jispa knows cycling without trainer wheels. She knew it about a month back. Also for the record she knew a good 5 years before I did. A father feels fulfilled.
Also for the record she swam the entire length of the pool once. Technically her swimming is a bit flawed but she surely swam the entire length of the swimming pool.
A father feels fulfilled.

Mumbai followed by Melancholy??

A French lady I know loves Mumbai as a city. It’s her favorite city. She is always on the road traveling from one city to another and I asked her if she missed France and why was Mumbai her favorite city. This is what she had to say. (To be a little philosophical, you see what you want to see. )

Her Answer:-
“No, to be honest I don't. For me home is everywhere but France whatsoever. I love my family and my friends but for holidays, my addictions are travels, photos, sharing something with people, everything real to me. The more I see, the more I need to learn... And France tends to be empty of values and full of selfish or superficial people, it's my opinion.

Again I don't know what happened but it's like having India still on me, in me, wherever I am. This feeling to miss everything from there didn't fade away over the last 8 months and I can't wait to come back and find answers to my questions. We'll see, patience is a virtue. And of course I'll let you know when I plan to get there.
It's funny cause when we arrived, I told Chris I had the impression that the place was familiar to me although I had never been there before. As usual he thought I was going nuts with my spiritual stuff, for example when I told him that amethyst could help develop intuition lol but I really felt this.

I can't explain why I loved it so much but people say I'm passionate when I talk about my experience in Bombay and I enjoy explaining what the om around my neck represents for me, which is my whole stay in the country. It's as if I had everything in this pendant and I feel very strange if I don't have it, it symbolizes my Indian journey.
Let's just say that in Bombay, I felt like addicted to the atmosphere, in another world, another century, always sharing something with someone. The interactions I had with the people where so full of humanity, so real. A little kid, anybody smiling at me could make my day, the smells, the temperature and humidity, the colors, the bay, just breathing and this impression to be filled of happiness by simple things.
And this fascinating culture, the books I've read on Hinduism, everlasting necessity to learn more about it and try to understand, the faith of people.
Some people who have been to India were surprised of my enthusiasm when talking about it. They said they had hated it because "it's smelly, crowded, noisy, dusty, there's no structure, people are tough to manage, the traffic, etc". And my answer was that yes, but that are the charms of India and that's what makes the country so unique, great and particular. And that I enjoy chaos anyway. Now they don't understand and I reckon it's simply a difference of vision, meaning I saw Bombay with other eyes.

The memories still remain. You guys, so nice to us made a lot and we appreciated a lot your friendliness and the way you received us and gave us the great opportunity to share a lot with you.
The people of our street, the Cafe Coffee Day waiters who made me a surprise offering me a mug with moving messages written on it, the feeling to somehow belong to this place when I walked down the streets despite being a foreigner, the people accepting me as a white girl and sharing a tea with them, the funny kids I wanted to hug, the fact that you can see absolutely anything in India: the guys trying to sell giant balloons, toys or tam-tams whereas you're an adult and keep trying when you say no, full of hope, the food on the streets, eat with fingers, the way people share a meal altogether instead of having each a plate, our super helpful neighbors, the way the cleaning boy was looking at us because he thought we were crazy, our super driver Khan who was as a second father, the bargains on Colaba Causeway, going to Polly Esthers with Chris and coming back home in a carriage, the easy access to great places for weekends, watching those guys playing cricket by the University park, having an argument with my ex-boyfriend I was with in Bombay because he was mad at me when I made friends with the dogs and defended them saying "George also deserves some attention and understands what you say "(for me, all the dogs are named George, don't ask me why!), having this lizard in the kitchen and calling him Mohinder as if he was our pet, listening to Indian music while getting prepared for meetings, wandering in the Taj Hotel just for the smells and beauty of everything, having an american breakfast with Chris at Café Mondegar after a blast, etc etc etc.

I will always remember our last day in India. We decided to have the 30min cruise and enjoy the sun. All the memories accumulated over the 3 months in India came to my mind and I couldn't help crying thinking life was so beautiful on one hand and sad about the idea of being empty without all that, terrified to the country on the other hand. Chris was getting sun-tanned, sorry sun-burnt :), and the picture was really funny: him turning into a lobster and me into a fountain! Then a little girl on the boat asked my name, handed me her box of popcorn and offered me some. You have no idea how I felt full of joy, alive, real.

So yes, Bombay is different, so is India and every time I see an Indian person, I smile at them and am sure they understand I still have a foot there...”



There she wrote it very well. If what people think and see are actually a peep in what they are, Marie is a very beautiful person :)



On another note – I happen to be the editor at our international division internal mailer. This requires me to write some ed’s note every quarter. I love writing complete crap and leaving a few riddles in. the market’s are really bad now and no business is happening and hence the nate’s style and tone. See if you can catch the circular reference in the note.

Aesop explained the merit of a reed in the face of headwind. The mighty oak was too rooted in his past, too rooted for what or where he stood. Too rooted, period! Surly we face difficult times, and no amount of external motivation can help face issues as they arise. The voice of doom creates as much clutter as the crackling of a boom. Could the mantra possibly be to stick to basics and follow your own calling? Cutting through the eschatological noise requires a deep firm belief in yourself and your work. The deep inherent strength is probably what Sheldon Kopp meant when he titled his book ‘if you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him’. Not meaning to sound sadistic, but to the contrary; Killing the Buddha is looking deeply within us, understanding who we are, our failings, our strengths and everything that goes along with it, us. We are the experts in the journey of our own lives. A ha – Philosophy, eh? – the last refuge of the dumbfounded? The Lonely Planet on India warns that when you meet a sadhu, be on guard. The sadhu has been since centuries also a way for the criminal to hide.
To conclude I borrow the closing verse words of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow who while reciting the heart of a young man to a psalmist wrote:
Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.

are you game?

Today while I was walking to the station today I thinking about how dirty we keep our public infrastructure. The city is so dirty. The civic body cares two hoots about cleanliness. The bridge I took to the station was tarred and there were so many cracks in it. I thought about Singapore and the fact that the pavement was smooth and devoid of any hazards. In Mumbai you look down and walk, else you might just trip. Look at the photo of my bridge.
I was cursing us when I suddenly realized. I realized that those cracks have allowed me to play a game every single day walking on the streets ever since I can remember. Not stepping on the cracks. Ensuring only one step between two cracks, or two steps for long gaps. If a right foot steps on a crack the next crack must get the left foot. And many such countless variations. I played them as a child I play them now.
If these cracks go I will miss them. Walking might be so boring. This is what they call interactive art installations. The rich are now striving for them. We have had them since ages. Now look again at the photo and let your imagination run a while. Don’t you see a beautiful checkerboard. A kid fantasy of being part of a large life size board. Of avoiding the snakes or passing through their bellies, perhaps climbing the ladder, jumping over other pawns. You decide the roll of dice, the rules and the competition. After all dude – you are the game.

thank you shitheads, you make my life... deep?

But to act, that each tomorrow, find us farther than to-day. Henry Longfellow is so right. Any experience and any day must take us further. That applies to holidays as well. This holiday we were in Haridwar, Rishikesh and Chamba. Being in Haridwar it easy to now understand why the there was resentment against the Brahminical tribe and their practice. I use the term loosely to describe those people who purport to show the way to God and spiritual upliftment. An important part of their trade (surely is a commerce) is to play on the fact that you would be able to absolve yourself of your guilt and bad behavior by merely following some magic formula. And guilt alleviation doesn’t some cheap.
At Haridwar we got sucked in by a guy getting us to perform some Pooja at the Ghat. I show Jispa believing it and repeating what the mantra the Pujari was asking us to repeat. This is not what I want to pass on to my kid. No Chance.
What I made a decision was that I will NEVER ever want to get caught doing anything ritualistic. No poojas, no rituals, no tikas, no bowing. Just belief in yourself, your actions and your inner voice. That itself is important, nothing else. I will probably still release a diya in the river, light one, cover my house with a garland, play the bhajan CD first thing in the morning in the car. Those are my feel goods. My vibes. But they will not be a source of strength or a belief that it will absolve me of any guilt.

I am glad that dickhead accosted me and showed me what an ass I am. Thank you for all the crappy shits (there is a long list of them in my life) in the world. What would I have learnt without you?

Zubin and Jerry's

I got tickets to the Zubin Mehta show featuring the Israeli philharmonic orchestra. Along with it were two supposedly famous vocalists as well. I took Jasmine along to witness something I used to always dream about. Wow the beautiful orchestra, some amazing singing with a tenor and a soprano and some outstaying music.

While entering I really felt weird. Since I had really decent tickets I was in the really decent que. All the others were dressed in their party bests and you had some in suits and blazers. Its amazing how for an Indian classical the people wear Indian traditional and for western classical they wear western formals. I find incredulous, the fact that people dress up for concerts, plays or even movies. I mean is that a social gathering or an entertainment event. Just wear your everyday clothes and run. I happened to be wearing a kurta on my denims. That too because I was wearing one the whole day. I must have been the only wise guy in Indian clothing. I was wearing them on my torn denims but changed on Jasmine’s request. The only thing that stopped me from wearing my shorts was the fact that I knew that all the parsi bawa bawi’s would be all well dressed. So I wore denims in deference to them. Well what the hell. On to the show.

I did not understand anything of it. I hardly even appreciated it. Now I know why I should never buy the tickets. Sure it was great music but all I could think about was tom and jerry. Well that’s all I associate classical western with. I could only visualize tom throwing stuff at jerry and jerry avoiding it. Until I heard Zubin Mehta I did not realize that Tom and Jerry has some good classical music. I now see Hanna and Barbera (creators of T&J you nitwit) in new light. Actually the person to thank for the music is Scott Bradley. Thank you dear Tom and Mr. Jerry for introducing me to culture.

Entertainment and sleep

I have become like dad used to be. I can’t keep awake for long. A late night movie and I just sleep through the end. We were with some friends in Matheran and I fall asleep. On Friday we had some friends over and while talking I just fell asleep. No sleep deprivation for me. The next day we went to see a play and I slept through a part of it. Oh god. Sometimes I even sleep in office. Catch a cat nap. That’s important. Any time is good. I am famous for dozing off in flights. Especially during landing. I guess that time one mentally tunes off and there’s really not much to do. Conversations typically stop. So the best thing is to doze off.

The play we went for was a kiddie play at Prithvi. Sanjana Kapoor who runs Prithvi theatre is doing a stellar job. Jasmine, Jispa and me and have seen atleast 15 odd plays (all kiddie) there. She has figured that a venue is only as alive as you want it to be. She has kept it alive involving all unlike the principle of selective exclusivity. She could have well and truly made it exclusively for the “higher order” of creative and slowly the place would have been teeming with left wing hot headed, bearded bull shitters. But the place has something to it. A character that’s unique. Lovely.

On Dussera we went to Girgaun chowpatty with Jispa. The idea was to see the Ravan burn. But since we were a little early we took tickets for the Ram lila that was being staged there. It was so silly and so badly hammed, organized and played out. The story jumped due to time constraints. The characters place themselves thanks to the mikes hanging only at some locations. I really can’t believe that they have a ridiculously low budget for something as big as this. If you plan well put a good show in place, do some decent PR then the crowd will definitely come in and pay good money. But what the hell, the audience which was from the cow belt was not complaining and they were having a good time. Who am I to complain? The theatre played out silly, I had a good time, Jispa did some TP and they burnt the Ravan in the end. Wheeeeeeee……

Hanuman and Ravan were the best of them all.
She loves to run -

Check this dude traveling - tin man would have been soo proud.

let me see if I learnt something from myself

I have been playing squash for around a year now and have hardly ever played doubles. Must have been around a couple of times. But I guess you can get the hang of the game pretty quick. Yesterday we were around four of us and we started to play. I was the minnow and one of the four was the reigning club squash champion. So I get partnered with him. The guy is so good that I figure all I have to do is to somehow return the ball when it’s in my territory. He will manage the rest. For some reason I focused so hard that I thought I hit some shots that I could never have hit ever. I had a large percentage of shots in. I think it’s just that I could not let the partner down. How can the reigning champion lose? I noticed what he was trying to play. He was playing front and he tried playing everything because I was weak. But that made him come too far back and he lost a couple of easy points. I think he would played better if he stuck to core game. Sure he would need to compensate a lot but if he trusted his partner a little more then he would got a lot more points. The match was more even teams with each team having a relative minnow like me. This time he was against us and I saw him do the same mistake. You lose your core, you lose. Period. It better to trust your partner and lose than to run all around trying to win it by yourself. Sure its supreme self confidence but, you will have to learn to trust your partner a bit more. Lose a bit but you definitely move up as a team. Steve Waugh used to do it while batting. He never shielded the tail from the bowling attack. If it’s a single to be run on the first ball so be it. Trust your men to grow up to the challenge and face the music. Immediately when I played the singles afterwards, the shots didn’t go as well, my percentage was bad etc. I rarely play squash to win. I really don’t care about the scoreline but in doubles I just cant bear to let the partner down. Just not acceptable. Let me see if I learned something from my self.

I suddenly realized that there was one thing that I have not done as a father in his rightful rite of passage. Every father is supposed to teach their kid cycling. Jispa wanted to learn. I kept putting it off but then I realized what I was doing. I took her out and taught her a bit. Two sessions and she was doing good. Life is better for the dad with training wheels but it was nice. I got to basically balance for a few seconds on two wheels before she gets back on the training wheel. But its good progress. I told Jasmine that she now will figure it on her own. Take her down during the school days and I will take her down during the holidays and we are done. My god, if she learnt cycling without me teaching her, I would have lost so much. It’s a good thing I realized in time.

wow that was deep

From October onwards our office has announced that all Saturdays will be off. That is a good thing. Sure I will miss wearing all my lovely t shirts to office. All the sexy dri-fits but, hell, it sure is fun to start the weekend on every Friday. And this is just what I want to re start teaching. I love teaching. I will reorganize my thoughts, try and think of a proper syllabus and start teaching. It’s a must.
Interaction keeps you young, energetic and on your toes. That’s the bets way to do it. A proper subject with proper studies and course material. No being lazy. Proper home work and proper assignments and pre reads and post reads. Well that’s the plan at least. It’s worth trying to put in place a discipline. I have changed over the last few years and it does reflect in my approach. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I had remained the same over all these years. What was suited for a younger trainee is soo not suited for someone who is a little up on the ladder. To be truthful, I don’t think I had too much in me as regards emotional intelligence when I started my career. Right now also many times I feel exasperated with certain situations but at least now I would be much in control of them. Recognizing them is the first step to improving I guess. Many times you don’t even know what you are doing is wrong. That’s when a good coach helps.
What happens when you don’t have a good coach? The classical treatise Mahabharat has an answer. Do what Eklayva did. Assume that your coach is there with you. What would he say? What would he want you to do? How would he have wanted you to behave? In life your coaches come and go. They impact you on your life and then either you or he moves on. I have seen that if you remember the basics of what they have taught you, you can remember it regularly enough to behave as if he was there in the present with you. That itself will help you improve. You may not have the coach for all situations and fields, but it is surely quite easy to adapt the coaching from one field to another. Your cricket coach can teach you about handling people that will help you in office. Parenting can teach you about responsibility. Teaching can teach you parenting. Inferences can be got across fields. Many times when stuck I would imagine the best possible coach for the situation. Then I would try to think of what he would do, or want me to do. It could even be your father, sister, friend or anyone who might do better than you.
Coaching also helps you get better. When you try to talk to someone and listen carefully to what they are saying then you are only going to help yourself improve. Many times my ‘wisdom’ has come when I lest expect it. I wouldn’t even know of something I know unless I have said it. Then I think to myself – wow, now that was deep.
I am currently reading ‘Surely you are joking, Mr Feynman. Man, that book is crazy funny. The way these guys get exposure in the top colleges in US is amazing. I would like to have the option of sending my kid to a good college, that will help her broaden her horizon not restrict it. Open up. Read around. Choose stuff from outside your field. Feynman was a physicist, who took up a summer internship in Biology just to go to a different field. I’d love to do something like that. Just go around explore a few things outside your core area, outside your comfort zone.

Camera phone is an amazing things

Photo blogging – there again the lazy option to real writing! This is the famous steps at Mahim where Vinu fell trying to catch the train. The stop has been revisited by Jispa around 15 years since. Moral of the story - Blind men must not run or risk losing a chin.

The beautiful Humayun’s tomb at Delhi. What an underrated monument. I guess that’s just because the Taj is so close by.

The photographer (sonal) and her muse (shazeen)
I love the clouds and the sun interplay.
Jispa collecting shells at Chowpatty beach at Mumbai.
The Ganesh Visarjan, where the idol is taken for ritualistic “drowning” (immersion). I like to go with Jispa. The tenth day is crazy with the crowd when 75% of the idols are immersed. But the 3/5th day the crowds are much more manageable.

I love this pic. If you see closely the clouds have burst open in the background and its raining there. Soon the rain will be here. They surely come and the result of a passing cloud burst with the sun shining is a magnificent rainbow. Next photo please…

continue the experiments

The fast on Friday held true. I think you get hungry only if you think about food else it really does not matter I guess. One day is hardly anything. When I am fully loaded and well fed I weigh 71 kgs and the morning after the fast on an empty stomach I weigh 68 kgs. 3 kgs of shit. I didn’t know that! Now I know. Passing through the popcorn aisles was a little wired on the stomach though. But I really liked the experience. I hope I am able to fast once a year. Also one day I want to know what it is to fast for 8 days. It’s also enlightening to know what the brain makes you think. It tells you – forget it. Eat now. You know you can fast, whom are you proving to. Then I am fighting back saying – I have only my self to prove to. NO I am not eating. I can hold it off for sure. I hate to believe that i cannot control the brain!

I watched three movies over the weekend. Mumbai Meri Jaan on Friday, ‘Rock on’ on Saturday and Wall E on Sunday. I loved all of them. Very rare to see three movies in three days and to like all of them. I don’t why but Wall E was one that I particularly liked. These days the a few of the last Disney animations were boring me. Wall E was different. It hardly felt like animation. They could make robots act! Very very cool. Unsaid emotions. Hardly a dialogue but a lots of emotion.

It was Jispa’s birthday on Sunday. Poor kid was a little upset that she could not celebrate with her friends. Her friends were also celebrating paryushan and could not be a part of her day. We tried our best to cheer her. It was her day where she decided what she wanted to do. For some reason she likes going to the zoo. She must have been there some zillion ties already but she never bores. I guess a zoo is special in a child’s life.

We were singing a song from the movie ‘rock on’. It goes something like – yeh pani gila kyun hai. As in – why is the water wet. When she turns around and asks me – papa, why is the water wet? Oh ok – I don’t know – ask Google. So we have written on her whiteboard all the questions she wants to ask. The second one was on the magnets. The third on – you decipher and tell me. It’s in her cryptic language I guess. Actually its just her short form.

The third question is - When do apples grow? the first drawing is 'apple'. the second drawing represents 'growing'. The third is a string of Alphabtes representing - guess guess... go on try it - ok - they represent the first alphabets of the calendar months. translation - when do apples grow? or In which months do apples grow? or in which season do apples grow.

We went to Mahalaxmi temple after a long long time. During our courtship Jasmine and me went more number of times. We asked for a lot form God. I did for sure. It’s been some time that I have asked for some thing from God, except strength and intelligence. I keep trying to inculcate the same in Jispa. Don’t bribe God.


Yesterday I proved to myself that I have some of my dad’s genes. I drive to the railway station and park my car and collect it in the evening. Yesterday while returning I normally cross a small desolate patch. The road’s been recently done and its used by trucks a lot. The gutter’s on the road create hollows. So some good guys I think put stones on the gutter so that motorists are adequately warned. The stones must have broken by the number of trucks going over it and were all over the road. Yesterday for some reason the street lights were off as well. I saw bike coming straight in, hitting a stone and falling over. I got off. The guys was fine, some other guys on the road helped him up. But I felt something. I kept my dad in mind and I picked up all the stones on the road and dumped them at the side. It took some doing. But I felt nice to do it. I hope I did my father proud. He was a nice guy, true, helpful and straight. He would have done it. I did it.

Experimenting with hunger

I am always trying to experiment with new ideas and new theories. This week the jain festival of prayushan is on. This is the week of fasting and praying by all Jains. I have never really fasted this week. Not that I am too ritualistic in any case. I don’t go too often to temples in any case. So it’s never been a festival for me to be a part of. I don’t even know my prayers beyond the first para. :)
But last time I decided to fast one whole day. In Jainism fasting is a much rigorous than others. You can only drink water in a fast. And you can only eat the next day. Last time was nice. I could get through it easily. The last few hours were fun.
I have started fasting again today. It amazing how one looks at food when you are fasting. The chips look tasty, the bread looks tasty etc etc. Without realizing one gets drawn towards food. I already put in a little Prasad (sweet laddu) and a cracker in without thinking. I realized it only later. But that’s good. Its teaching me a thing or two about being hungry. I have to drink more water. Right now I am feeling funny. And its only 11.21 am. Lets see how the day progresses.
The key is to keep busy and drink tons of water.

12.22 – one hour hence – busy so not been hungry!

1.28 –its lunch time. The hungrier I get the more resolute I become.

Afternoon – Hungry hungry hungry. I see fruit plates roaming around looking tempting. Biscuits never felt so aromatic. Hehehehe . It’s pretty tough. I have a numb throbbing feeling in my head. Not too bad though. The growl in the stomach is louder than anything else I get. An empty stomach heightens all the rest of the senses.

I am leaving office. Lets see how the evening pans out.

picture perfect

When you nothing much to write then show a few pictures. A picture is worth a thousand words. So here are a few thousand words:
This is independence day flag hoisting at Manoribel– a beach resort on the outskirts of Mumbai. I love this place. Chilling and lazing on the hammock all day. The next photo is the view from my favorite seat at this place. Hehehehe

Life moves at a snail’s pace in Manori, actual plus metaphorically.
The three lovely puppies that are in our building. One recently died under a car. Sad. Jispa is getting used to the concept of death.
Aurora theatre. An old theater in Mumbai that is yet to be refurbished. The good part is that till then the seat prices are so low that you don’t mind a bad movie at the place. I mean for 100 bucks for a seat in an A/c hall, the picture is a bonus. Look at the ticket counter, look closely and you realize how thick the wall really is. It’s at least a foot deep. It feels funny talking to the guy. Its like talking to Alice in wonderland after she fell inside the burrow.
Two kids sat next to me in the train to work today. I made as many faces as I could possibly muster up. Try as I might, he just refused to smile. He just kept ignoring me, glancing once a while but no smile. How cheap yaar. The next one is his brother (I guess). He was Mr. perpetual frown, but at least he gave me a short quick smile before moving to his forwny self.